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I Spoke With A Cancer Psychologist Today

The best quote he gave me was "What you resist persists!"

By Denise E LindquistPublished 3 months ago 3 min read
I Spoke With A Cancer Psychologist Today
Photo by ALEXANDRE DINAUT on Unsplash

I say the best quote he said is "What you resist persists!" This was after I told him that anytime I start to feel sick, I think it has to be cancer! I worry about my cancer appointments. I worry about other people's cancer. I have two Dr. Suess sweatshirts that I wear all of the time about cancer.

I wanted to move up north because I love the outdoors. Yes, even the winter. I don't go outdoors much as I live in farm country where the farmers spray their crops with a product that is blamed for the cancer I have had.

I know it is on all of the fields around us as the farmer said we are the only ones to complain. He wanted to plant a crop on our property and at the time the property belonged to my husband and his brother. His brother agreed to use the chemical to plant a crop.

The psychologist said that he believes that I should stop focusing on cancer and start to live life without cancer. Because 'No Cancer' is still what the oncologists are saying after 10 years.

I told him easier said than done. He then put it another way. "What if it was an irritating friend, family member, or neighbor? "Would you invite them in for supper, to watch a movie, to take to bed?"

I'm sure I was shocked that he put it that way, and my expression must have shown it! "No, you wouldn't and that is what I would like you to think of cancer, as being something you don't want around. Something you kick outside when it comes up. Can you do that?"

Then he said, "Change out of that cancer sweatshirt when we are done talking, wash them, fold them and put them in a drawer, and only wear them to see your oncologist."

The other quote he gave me was when I said, I would like to not live in farm country. We have talked about traveling around for part of the year. I said we know it will take more than a year to prepare for that. He said, "You know that saying, eat an elephant one bite at a time?"

"That is how you should take this." Slowly. First, rent a Recreational vehicle (RV) and try it. You may not like RV living. Maybe move into an apartment in a seniors building. It is still downsizing, take one corner of your house at a time and tackle that." You can enjoy the outdoors from anywhere.

He gave me some help with one other thing and it amounted to me wanting to be the best wife, mother, grandmother, relative, and friend I can be. He thought that plan was great!

We laughed a few times during the session and he said I should laugh more as I have a good laugh. I told him I do laugh, as I am in laughter yoga and would be laughing right after our appointment, and that I laughed with Jim Gaffigan as I waited to talk to him.

He just laughed at all of that! He was really easy to talk to. He told me that he talked to about 23,000. people in his time working in cancer programs. I thought that was something I should have kept track of. He was just 2 years younger than I am.

With maybe 32 people a week, 50 weeks a year, it would only take 14-15 years. 4 days a week @ 8 people, remember the 30. minute sessions. Now, I wish that I would have kept track of everyone I met individually or in groups in my career. Everything we talked about was helpful!

Our appointment was for 30 minutes as he said, that is how long most of his appointments are. He said I can call him anytime I want. And we ended at 30 minutes on the button. I couldn't imagine going to more than one session and I didn't really think it would help. I guess time will tell!


About the Creator

Denise E Lindquist

I am married and we have 7 children, 25 grands and 9 greatgrandchildren. I work part-time as a culture consultant. I started writing A Poem a Day in February 5 years ago. I've written 4 - 50,000 words in NaNoWriMo. Now Vocal and Medium.

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