Psyche logo

I Quit Social Media For Good… Here’s Why

I’m leaving The Truman Show

By Juan CienfuegosPublished 2 years ago 11 min read
Like
I Quit Social Media For Good… Here’s Why
Photo by Aleks Dorohovich on Unsplash

So… I’ve been thinking a while ago about quitting social media. And the main reason it’s because I want to spend less time on the screen and more time in the real world. I want to rest my eyes by the end of the day and just spending time with my family or friends. I’ve been noticing I while ago that I feel mentally really tired by the end of the week, and I’m really aware that is because I spend most of my time watching a screen. I mean, my main job is to write on this platform.

And, I don’t know how to explain this but there have been some “signs” that I feel are telling me that probably it’s the best time to do it. The first sign was some kind of alert. I started to feel anxious every time I opened Instagram, and it’s because I created a new publication on this platform and I wanted to make some publicity on Instagram. You know, drive some traffic to my publication by making posts on Instagram. But it took me a lot of time to create the content and then post it. And, I did saw some traffic coming from Instagram to my publication, but it didn’t make up for the time invested in it. And I know, you are supposed to do it organically, so that’s how I wanted to do it. But time passed and I didn’t see any improvements.

So… after 6 months of spending a lot of time creating posts for Instagram, I just said “That’s enough. I’m done!”. By the end of the day, I didn’t feel satisfied with the content that I made, and actually, I felt guilty because I felt that, that time could be better spent writing stories on this platform. And, believe me, I tried. I did several campaigns, I did everything that influencers recommended to do “to drive traffic to your platform” and “gain followers organically”.

And I’m sorry, but Instagram rules are just stupid… a few years ago Instagram algorithm said that the most important thing was to give likes and follow. Then, the most important thing was to make carrousels. Later, that the most important thing was to publish stories. Now, that we have to save the post for later and share it through DMs. Why all these dumb rules? Since when do we have to do what an algorithm says? And most important… Why do we have to!?

Don’t get me wrong it’s not just because of the traffic thing. It’s not about the outcomes. It’s something deeper, that it took me a long time to realize what was going on inside my mind. But I finally figured it out.

It was about time.

I used to spend a lot of time on Instagram trying to grow the platform and trying to drive some traffic to my stories. But, of course, if you’re on Instagram you start to watch other people’s publications. And you just scroll, and scroll, and scroll. And when you see the time, you’ve spent at least 15–30 minutes watching randoms Instagram posts.

And, I have a question for you.

Do you actually remember anything that you just saw now on Instagram while you were scrolling down?

That’s exactly my point.

So if you combine the time you spend creating content, which implies taking/searching pictures, editing them, picking the best ones, finding the right quotes, looking for the trending hashtags about your niche… do I need to continue? And don’t forget we just wasted 15 minutes scrolling down on the platform. I mean if you’re an influencer and Instagram is your main source of income, of course, you have to do all these things, and even more. But, if you want to use it as a tool for publicity, I think it takes a lot of your precious time to make all these steps to gain a couple of likes and views. It is just not worth the time. Instead, if you’re a Vocal Media writer and hit the “share” button you can easily make free publicity by sharing your stories on Twitter, Linked In, or Facebook. And, it drives traffic like hell. In just one click… well, three actually.

Hit the “share” button

Choose your social media.

Click “Publish”. That’s it.

So, my anxiety came from spending a lot of time on something that didn’t satisfy me and also didn’t make any improvements to my work. It’s not anything wrong with that social media, it just wasn’t the right one for me and my goals.

My socials. Source: screenshot from JuanSC’s iPhone.

But… it’s not just about work

I was talking about these with some friends, and they told me that they felt the same way. But they felt it with their personal Instagram feed. And, actually, some of them quitted social media because of that. Therefore, I realized it was the same reason, but for different purposes. This was the second “sign”. Friends were feeling the same way.

Think how much time do you actually spend making a good post on your feed? How many pictures do you take? And how many poses do you do before you choose “the right one” to upload to your feed? I mean, let be honest we don’t behave like that in real life. We don’t stand at the beach crossing one leg in front of the other and arc our arms just to see the vastness of the ocean. We just…stand.

So… as I mentioned before, creating content that implies taking pictures, editing them, picking the best ones, finding the right quotes, looking for the trending hashtags about your niche… what for? A bunch of likes and some comments of people you don’t even know? And what happens if you get fewer likes than usual with that post that you invest so much time and effort on? That post that you really feel proud of but you don’t get the incomes you would expect? Then what happens?

That craving for “likes” drives insecurities, and therefore anxiety. We all know that social media was made with a reward system, just like when you gamble. The DW published an article about “Instant gratification and the pursuit of perfection: Why our brains love Instagram”. And they describe when the brain’s reward system is activated. “Dar Meshi, a neuroscientist at Michigan State University, was the first person to examine people who use social media using an MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) scan. The brain scan showed which brain regions are active when we post or like something or when someone likes our posts.”

“When the like notification appeared, the brain’s reward system was active. This region is called the ventral striatum. It’s also active when we’re presented with food, drinks, sex, and money — and during drug consumption.”

That notification sound is a sign for your brain that someone is liking your pictures, commenting or maybe someone just published a new story, reel, or picture. That constant alert, that nowadays most of us have it disabled, but just by seeing any other tool from the notifications like that little globe with a number on it implies how many things you haven’t check out yet drives the FOMO.

According to the Center for Mental Health, “Social media can also heighten anxiety by increasing users’ ability to keep up to date with the activities of their social circles. The popular concept of Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) refers to “a pervasive apprehension that others might be having rewarding experiences from which one is absent and is ‘characterized by the desire to stay continually connected with what others are doing. FOMO has been linked to intensive social media use and is associated with lower mood and life satisfaction.”

But… just think about it for a moment. What is your real FOMO? What are you afraid of? I made that question to myself and made a little experiment before quitting social media. I opened Instagram and for five minutes I saw every story of the people I follow and also scrolled down to see the newest publications. And I realized, I wasn’t missing anything important at all. Of course, what we consider important is very subjective and personal.

What our subconscious is actually afraid of is the “if”.

What if I’m not here when something important happens? But listen, while I was scrolling down I saw a post of something that I considered important, and it was a picture of a friend of mine. In that picture, there were a couple of friends, and I was in that photo too. It was from a few hours earlier that we gathered together in the park, but it wasn’t planned. Most of us are neighbors, and it happened that we were in the same place, just by coincidence. The perks of living in the same neighborhood. And we really had a great time.

Do you see my point?

That important thing that I just saw on social media, I lived it and enjoyed it in real life a few hours before! And the other thing is that I had that picture on my phone because she shared it on the WhatsApp group. So… did I really miss anything? Not at all!

There’s also this illusion of “being connected” and having thousands of friends, but we actually don’t. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I mean, I have few friends but they’re like my family. I know I can trust them, and they know they can trust me. But that’s because we built this friendship over time, spending time together, living experiences together, and even traveling together, but in the real life.

There is a paragraph written by Maryellen Hack on Signs of The Time that describes perfectly what the illusion of being connected looks like. She said, “Instead of spending time fostering real-life relationships, I’d actively filled the void by “stalking” people online and distracting myself with frivolous entertainment. I’d begun justifying my solitary state by telling friends and family that I was “too busy to catch up” — an excuse that crumbled under the weight of hours of Instagram scrolling.”

She also explained that “In 2018, the Australian Loneliness Report revealed that 51 percent of Australians feel lonely for at least one day per week, and 28 percent feel lonely for three or more days per week. A Psychology Today blog post referred to multiple studies that show loneliness can trigger higher levels of social anxiety, fewer social interactions, poorer sociological wellbeing, and poorer quality of life. Further, lonely people are 15 percent more likely to be depressed and 13 percent more likely to be anxious about social interactions than those who don’t feel lonely.”

And what if you see that beautiful coffee shop on Instagram that’s in your city and someone else posted a picture from there? Don’t look at it on your screen, grab your keys and go there! Live it! Call your friends and say “hey! let’s go here”. Do memories for yourself, take pictures for yourself. Spend time with your family and friends in real life. Don’t do it for a social media platform. Make real connections, recover what is more important. And don’t be afraid of missing out on anything. If something that is really important to you happens, they will call you, they will text you.

Believe me, you will know!

So… that’s why I’m quitting social media. I’m done living this virtual life. I’m done watching beautiful photos of places I want to be or places I used to be. I want to be there, in all those places. I want to hang out again with those people, and I want to have real connections again. If I want to go out with somebody I will text them or call them. If they want to know about me and I do really care for them, they will call me. It’s like that. I want to feel satisfied by the end of the day with the time I have invested in my work.

Remember, what really matters is our time. Don’t give it to social media, give it to yourself, give it to your loved ones.

Last but not least, this is not just about me.

The Wall Street Journal made a magnificent investigation about the toxicity of Instagram and how it affects directly the mental health of teenagers.

Last Monday, Frances Haugen testified in the U.S. Senate about the leaked information she gave to the WSJ about The Facebook Files where she explained that Facebook is a platform where its algorithm works in order to show you things that will get you mad or make you feel anger just consume more of their content in the platform without caring mental health of its users.

I’m leaving The Truman Show.

Spend time in the real world, and less in the virtual one.

social media
Like

About the Creator

Juan Cienfuegos

Host of BitCorner 🎙️The 1st Salvadoran Bitcoin Podcast | Author of The Savior: #Bitcoin 🇸🇻⚡️ | engineer + educator

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.