I Didn’t Know I Was A Maladaptive Daydreamer

Wiki Definition: Maladaptive daydreaming, also known as excessive daydreaming, is a disordered form of dissociative absorption associated with vivid and excessive fantasy activity that often involves elaborate and fanciful scenarios. It can result in distress, can replace human interaction, and may interfere with normal functioning such as social life or work.

I’d never heard of this term before coming across a video on Tik Tok and decided to do some further research about it. Well, I’m glad I did before my daydreaming could worsen. I possess most of the symptoms already and it's truly becoming an addiction for me. A way to escape my reality. But more than ever (since quarantine) I've been daydreaming my days away.

Common symptoms include:

- very vivid daydreams with detailed characters, settings, plots etc.

- daydreams are triggered by real-life events, books, movies

- trouble sleeping at night

- overpowering desire to continue daydreaming

- performing repetitive movements while daydreaming

- making facial expressions while daydreaming

- whispering and talking while daydreaming

- daydreaming for long periods of time

- trouble completing everyday tasks

From the Healthline article : https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/maladaptive-daydreaming#symptoms

Maladaptive daydreaming is relatively a new discovery by Professor Eli Somer in 2002. It isn’t a recognized condition yet, neither having any official treatment as more examinations are required. However, there has been allot of theories suggesting it could be linked to dissociative personality disorder because of the detachment from reality. I personally see this theory as plausible since I tend to disassociate, and daydreaming has become a coping mechanism for my reality and anxieties.

I don’t know how and when it started (maybe in my teens) but it’s become a normal routine in my life. I began to question my sanity and mental health at times when I would catch myself muttering and acting out movements repeatedly. At the time I justified it from being an actor, that I was simply just performing characters. Like some sort of acting tick. I did feel very much alone and was afraid to ask people around me if they could relate to what I was doing. But I didn't want to risk sounding crazy.

I am easily triggered by movies and music and will utilise characters and scenes to interject into my different daydream worlds. With music it completely envelopes me in, I don’t even realise the same song had been on repeat for hours. It really is the best part of my day and I find myself eager to be sucked back into my fantasies. I won’t go to sleep either and prefer to be awake for hours. I’ve also noticed that even though I excessively daydream I rarely actually dream. I couldn’t find any evidence that it was correlated to maladaptive dreaming, but I maybe dream every few months at least. Although, it could just be from a lack of sleep daydreaming all night.

I am so connected into my fantasy worlds that I like organising specific playlists and Pinterest boards to match and encourage more stimulation. However, I’ve become more aware of the negative effects from daydreaming excessively. You become so submerged into the perfect world you’ve created that months and years can pass you by. You’re trapped. But it won’t feel like you are. Daydreaming then becomes a replacement for human interaction, an abandonment to your daily activities, meals and selfcare. I will say I am able to control and allocate times to daydream but sometimes can be easily enveloped into one. I know that if I ever feel like it’s starting to completely take over my life, I’ll definitely see a therapist.

For now, to dangerously daydream is a risk, but I can’t help it…