How Are You Today?

"How are you today?" is a question friends and acquaintances commonly inquire, and it's not a question to be taken lightly. You may be thinking:

"Josh the grocery sales clerk doesn't actually care about how I'm doing, and he definitely doesn't want to listen to me ramble on about what I think of the government."

And that's probably true. However, your initial reaction to the question is useful for your own sake. Maybe nine times out of ten you just send back a:

"Doing well! How are you?"

But what was the first thing that came to your mind? Whether you just hit it off on a blind date or are dealing with the loss of a loved one, that first thought you have is a great way to gauge your current mental health status, because how often do we ask ourselves,

"How am I doing today?"

How often do we take the 2 seconds out of our day to interpret our emotions and actions, resolve an inner conflict, or appreciate a happy thought, and move forward either way with more control over what we do next?

Because the issue all human beings deal with is control. Control over the mind, and control over the body. We all snap at each other once in a while, and blame the usual suspects: sleep deprivation, hunger, or too much stress at work. But honestly, a Starbucks employee misspells your name or your spouse forgets to turn the lights off, and you just unload on them? That's the result of allowing a problem to fester without addressing its influence. Even if you cannot resolve the issue, recognizing it and compensating with an additional thought filter can keep you from doing something you'll regret.

On a personal note, I'll find myself feeling sad or mad and sometimes just by realizing where my mind's at and thinking,

"It's time for some happier thoughts"

I'll actually feel better. Ideally, I’ll have my phone or something to play music on, and chilling out with some Red Hot Chili Peppers, Volbeat, or K.Flay pulls me out of even the deepest ruts I slip into. I always remind myself that I can't control the world around me or the events that transpire, but being able to at least control myself, gives me a great deal of power over what happens next. More than you may realize.

If you have total control over your emotions and actions, then nothing can keep you from what you're trying to accomplish, and you won't waste any energy being upset about a lousy driver in front of you or an annoying coworker. You can just recognize the conflict with a quick thought "Wow, Dan's cat stories are really boring, but instead of telling him to shut up or remind him that cat's aren't people, I'll be a polite person who listens for two minutes and then nicely end the conversation."

Growing up, I was always taught by my parents to surround myself with positive people and fill my mind with positive thoughts. This is easier said than done, because all people eventually experience tragedies or can develop depression. Don't worry, I've never cut a friend out of my life because they were down on their luck. On the contrary, I check in more often with a "How are you today?" and you'd be amazed at how much of a difference just those words and a genuine care about their well-being can make. And when I make someone else feel better, it makes me feel better too. Speaking of which, if you found this article useful or are in need of someone to ask, “How are you today?” Feel free to message me through my website or hit me up on Facebook. I’ve always got time for a friend in need. ☺