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Growing Up with Social Anxiety

For anyone feeling like they're the only ones who have it.

By MelPublished 7 years ago 2 min read
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Anxiety: a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

Being 19 now, I've came to realize that having social anxiety isn't something only I have. I have met and talked to many people who also struggle with it, and it has helped me so much in coming to the reality of it. But it wasn't all like this.

It all started when I became a teenager. At 13, kids become teenagers. They start partying, going out with friends, and getting wild and crazy. But not me. For me, being 13 was the start of a lifelong nightmare for me. I started to get these feelings inside my mind that constantly would freak out over the littlest of things. I started hyperventilating over the smallest things like whenever my teacher would announce that we had to present our work to the class, to going into tears because the teacher put us into groups to do an assignment.

I, being only thirteen, was living life confused about what was just starting to happen to my body. Was this normal? Nobody else seemed to have to worry about this problem. Was I just a freak? Was I just a weirdo? Over thinking about it just seemed to make it worse. All of it soon mashed together in my brain and I began to just want to die. Maybe dying would make me feel better. Maybe if I just killed myself, it'll all stop. I wish, looking back at it to this day, that I could've just told someone about it. I'm sure if I even confided in my mother I would've gotten help. But I let fear get the best of me. I let my mind tell me that nobody would like you if they knew you were a freak. I was terrified of my own self.

By the time I was 15, I had slowly gotten used to having social anxiety. Of course, I have had problems along the way but I finally managed to get used to it inside my own head that this was something that many others have too, not just yourself. By the age of 15, I learned that I could confide in others to help me. I learned that I shouldn't let anxiety stop me from doing what I love.

Of course social anxiety did have some negatives to me. I have suffered from depression because of how the anxiety affected my mindsets. I have suffered in the lack of friends department due to the nerves that took over my entire body. Plus, nobody wants to have to deal with panic attacks at any time of the day over about anything that could happen to us.

Thank you for reading my story.

anxiety
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About the Creator

Mel

Ever since I was a kid, I've always wrote for fun. I never saw anything of it; I just wanted to write just to write. That's why I love Vocal.

she/they

instagram: stufflestream

tiktok: mercuryandme

youtube: Melon Melon | TheMelonVlogs

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