Finding a Sober Living in Spokane Valley, VA
Sober Living Near Spokane Valley, VA
Being clean, sober and living a productive life is easier than you think when you know about the resources and support you can get when you go for sober living in Spokane Valley WA. Having your circle of support is very important to your recovery, and so is finding a good drug rehab program that can help you kick the habit. When you realize there are so many different programs to choose from, how do you make the best choice? Here are some tips.
First of all, get the right information and support. You need to ask for help, whether it's from family or friends. Make sure you understand what is expected of you, and what your role will be in the group. Be specific about what you need so that you know what to expect and what you can do to get where you need to go.
Your circle of support should include those who have been through the same process as you are in. These people can give you encouragement, support and help you through the recovery process. There is nothing worse than being around people who don't want to be around you while you're going through a drug rehab program. You need their support and understanding. Let them know that they are important, too, and that they'll be able to offer you encouragement and help.
When you get into a sober living situation, you need to try to focus on getting healthy and keeping fit. This may mean that you'll need to join a fitness center and learn some exercise techniques. Take some yoga classes or go for a run. Anything to keep your mind off the negative thoughts you have about yourself. While you are attending classes, talk to your counselor and ask about what types of classes they offer for those recovering from addiction.
Even if you don't think you have a problem, it never hurts to get a physical. Going to the doctor for a physical will let you in the door with your friends sooner rather than later. This is also a good time to get a checkup because the doctors can find out whether or not you're under any type of medications. If you are, they'll be able to guide you to someone who can prescribe something for you to take.
Once you are released from the drug rehab center, you'll likely meet other people in the center. These can be good supports, but you'll also need to find some support on your own. Don't be afraid to network with others who have been through what you have. Even if you only get one or two people who will honestly say "I was the same way," you'll be glad you met so many people.
There are many support groups in Seattle for those who are living in the drug rehab. You can attend meetings on a weekly basis or if you're feeling lonely, join a support group for the drug addicts in your area. While it may not seem like it, these groups can be very helpful to those who are struggling. If you find that you are still having a hard time dealing with being sober, you might consider joining one of these groups so that you can get the help you need.
Living sober in Seattle doesn't mean you just give up everything you love. You should just be careful about what you use. If you have kids, make sure that you take them out often. Also, remember that if you are still having difficulty getting your life back to normal, then it's probably not worth it. Sober living in Seattle can be difficult at first, but when you see how much it can improve your life, you'll be glad that you gave it a try.
Boarderline Personality Disorder... What a name right? Well that is the diagnosis that was given to me by some psych chick way back when I was seventeen (I'm now closer to 40 then I am 30).
Hello for those of you who don't know me, my name is Kelsey Imus and I was born in Saint Joesph Hospital in Mishawaka, Indiana on Thursday, April 8, 1999. You could say my life was pretty normal and not too interesting as a little girl, just my mom, grandparents and I..That's all there ever was and all I truly needed. My biological father wasn't in the picture and he actually completely left my life when I was only two years old. Growing up as a little girl without a person to call "dad" at times really hurt me, just the thought of someone not wanting me was painful enough, let alone him initially leaving and not having him there and then the more hurtful thought that someone might actually not want anything to do with me, or worst..Not love me or care at all. Every young girl needs her dad, as every young boy needs his mother, they say the parent of the opposite sex is very important and sometimes vital for the child's proper development, especially mentally and emotionally. It's hard enough growing up, but when there's some chaos or disruption in a child's life it can temporarily or sometimes cause permanent damage to their life. My mom didn't like when I would ask about him or wonder where he was. "He doesn't want you! He left us." My mom would say, those words still break my heart, I can feel the pain in my chest and remember how much that hurt me as a young girl, my dad broke my heart before any guys could ever hurt me, and that sucks. My grandpa and grandma tried so hard to be a second set of parents and fill that void, but no matter how truly amazing they were, it was never enough. They were some of the most "perfect" people I had ever known in my life, they were just your average "normal", church-going, but understanding and kind type of grandparents. The kind that always tried to fix things and who's hearts broke when they couldn't, the ones that always were super man and woman and almost tried to be God. They were my heros, but it was simply never enough, until I learned that someone leaving doesn't take away from your value and I realized life goes on and sometimes things don't make even the tiniest bit of sense until much later, and that's okay. Some of the earliest memories I have from when I was a child, I was almost always at my grandparent's house because my mom was working all of the time, I loved watching Dora the Explorer eating pears and graham crackers and playing with PlayDoh. I also went to preschool at a church and when I graduated from that school, I remember singing a song about ducks up on stage all by myself. (Isn't that cute?) Some other memories from early on were ones such as my grandparents always reading to me or having me do puzzles, they even taught me how to ride a bike and tie my shoes. And before you know it I was doing even more on my own because of them! My grandma was always knitting in front of me and I actually LEARNED how to knit when I was like three or four, I was also always super intelligent from a young age, my mom would even ask how I knew certain things that I couldn't quite explain how I knew either. For instance my mom and older cousin were talking in the car when I was about four years old and I happened to say that someone was "manipulative" and they both turned around and asked me how I knew that word and I didn't have any explanation. In 2004 my mom met a guy that she started regularly seeing and actually got married to him in April 2004. At first my grandpa was skeptical and I didn't like him and idea of someone else having more of my mom's time especially because she was always at work and I hardly saw her to begin with but my grandma seemed to like him and actually supported the idea of my mom going out and getting to know him, so she did. At first it was weird having him around, mainly because I didn't know him or anything about him, and then he had a son that was really mean, he would always push me down and take my scooter, my grandparent's didn't like him either because of how mean he was to me and told my mom that she needed to not have him around me. But my mom eventually made the decision to move in with my step-dad which was a major change for a young girl already and then something else happened, much more drastic to my little short life already. His son molested me when I was about four or five years old. I remember one of the times he came in the room and told me he wanted to "play legos with me" and he actually locked the door and told me to pull my pants down and started to touch me and took me to multiple parts of the room, even under the bed to molest me. It seemed really bizarre to me that he was saying and doing these things because I never had someone talk to me that way but I didn't know any better, I had never even heard of anything like that, and my mom had never even expected to have to talk to me about anything like that. My mom found out because I said something that was a little off and alarming in front of an older cousin and she asked me more about why I said that and I said: "Because Timmy touched my privates." She freaked out, called my mom, and they both asked me: "Are you serious?!" My mom called my aunt and asked her what to do because it also happened to one of my family members and needed her advice. She said to: "Call CPS right away and tell them what happened so they can take a report." So she did right away, and they did take a report, just like my aunt said, but they ended up and labeled it as "child exploration" because his family and the perpetrator went in to the meeting and lied. They said that I: "wanted to do it." Which is completely horrifying and disgusting. I was four years old and didn't have any knowledge of perverse things like that. There's no way possible that I would've ever been exposed to those sorts of things and I never had anything happen to me before, but their family is a different story. My mom went completely batsh*t crazy and said to my step-dad he better stick by her side and stand up for me or she's done and divorcing his sick *ss, and she wasn't playing. It's serious as a heart attack when you mess with an angry Italian woman's family! So he did, but his family was so messed up and warped that he thought molestation was "normal" and my mom came to find out both of his sisters were molested by their step-dad and obviously then something probably happened to his demon son, which is an unfortunate case, but even more unfortunate that I was impacted at such a young age by his screwed up family dynamic. His mom actually told everyone after his two sisters were molested by a grown, pedophile that: "it wasn't molesting them, they were made to feel uncomfortable." Which sickens me even more. My step-dad went to counsling to get help with some of his issues from his childhood and some of the distorted views he had about what was "normal" or appropriate and what wasn't ever, as he worked through more and more issues he saw more clearly what the real issues are and the bigger picture, but it's understandable to think things are "normal" that are truly messed up if you are told your whole life that there isn't anything wrong with it. After that whole messed with scenario my mom instantly got my in counseling and on medications for my mood disorder, I had trouble controlling my emotions and moods due to the trauma, but between medications and counsling it got a lot easier for me to learn how to deal with what happened and work though my negative feelings and process them. I did have to get hospitalized in Kindergarten and everybody did a special thing and cheered me on when I came back, which was sweet, it made me feel a little better to know other kids missed me especially after having to go through something so horrific at such a young age and dealing with all the damage done afterwards. After getting somewhat managed with what my new reality was, I continued on and went to school, I got good grades, almost perfect all of the time, I was a straight A student all the way from elementary school to high school. I was super intelligent, people were always so impressed by my perfect test scores and my family was so happy to tell everyone how smart I was and how I was doing good in school and keeping up my grades. Most of my teachers, principals and fellow classmates liked me pretty well throughout the years too. I also did cheerleading in 3rd, 4th, 7th, 8th grade and started again in high school, I actually made it onto the Varsity Cheerleading Team my Sophomore year Football Season. I was so proud of myself, because that was also right after my grandma died in 2014, it was one of my first close people to die that I cared about and was hard on me, but I knew that if I made Varsity it would make her proud of me so I think that's also why I worked so hard to pratice and make the cut! I always memorized the cheers and dances so well that my team loved me! I've always had a good (maybe photogenic) memory so it made it helpful when going over cheers or routines because if other people forgot I would typically remember. My school life went pretty smooth other than people being envious and picking at me, but I learned to deal with those types of people better and not let them get to me so much. Also the crazy thing is I actually went to the same school as the perpetrator and throughout my time going to school with him they scheduled us in the same Geometry class one time after numerous complaints of harassement (even sexual) made by me about him. My mom couldn't believe that not only would they put us in the exact same class, but that after so many issues with him harassing me they wouldn't do anything but "talk" to him. I even tried to ask if they could change his class (He was a Senior in a Freshmen Geometry class.) They said no because his family would have to change it and they wouldn't and they also wouldn't change his girlfriend at the times locker which was right next to mine so he had easy access to torment me..(Disgusting.) So it got to the point the cops were called into the school by my mom, and I finally got tired of going to them, not being heard, and having them fix the issue so I changed MY class even though it should've been the other way around (protecting the perpetrator at all costs.) I also wrote multiple letters even dropping them in the hallway telling my story. etc I also found a note in the hallway and picked it up and it was almost like a sign at the time. It said something around the lines of: "We were given voices so we could speak up. Use yours." And I thought that was crazy, so I listened to my spirit, heart and spoke up I got to the point where I found the courage to walk up to him and his girlfriend at her locker (right next to mine) and went off on him in front of the whole school. I said: "Timothy Batchelor who gave you the right to stand by my locker and harass me after you molested me when I was four years old?!" He turned as red as a lobster and looked like he was on the verge of tears at one point and walked up to a teacher and asked him: "Can you tell her to stop?" The teacher basically threw his hands up and said "I don't know, what do you want me to do?" with his face and body language, but I wouldn't stop, I let him have every bit of it. Guess he shouldn't of molested me and pushed me to that limit tormenting me everyday for over a decade huh? I saw him whimpering over by the teacher and playing the victim and said: "Awww, why are you crying now you little perpetrator baby?! You should've left me alone, you weren't crying after you molested me at four years old or tormenting me this whole time! How do you like it, here's a taste of your own medicine!" He was so embarassed, and his girlfriend kept yelling in my ear: "Shut the f*ck up Kelsey, shut the f*ck up." And I told her: "You know what Alexus? You go get molested as a young girl and harassed by the person who touched you then you shut the f*ck up!" I was done with all of the bullcrap I took throughout the years and karma finally did it's job. Well I did, but anyways both the principal and vice principal came rushing down the hallway and loudly exclaimed: "What's going on?" and I told them that nothing was ever being done and I wanted to finally speak up on what was happening and my story and he said: "Come down to the office." And I ended up and called my mom and told her what happened, but I was also overcome with relief that everyone would know my story whether they admitted it or not and I felt resilient for the first time in my life I WAS A SURVIVOR. I also remember so many people telling me that I was around that time, and I was truly proud of myself and it inspired me to have my life goal as helping other people and inspiring them to overcome their struggles and teaching them that when you're strong, brave and resilient, nothing in this life can hold you back. It is my personal belief that you are the only one truly in control of your life and you hold the keys to all the doors you have to walk through in order to become successful on all levels. After my Sophomore year in Highschool was done, I went into Summer break with a more positive outlook on life and everything else. I also started to talk to a guy I liked named Allen, we became really good friends at first and I went to the park to see him all the time. My mom didn't know him or anything about him and was hesitant to even let me meet a guy at the park, but I insisted it would be fine and she finally agreed to let me meet him JUST AT THE PARK nowhere else, you don't leave with him, etc, etc. She gave me a whole list of rules understandably (She was a good, protective mom). So I would go see him at the park for a few months at first I didn't really like him, I honestly thought he was kind of homely (Sorry if that's a little harsh), But then when I got to meet with him more I noticed things that actually attracted me to him like the fact that he was funny, or that he was respectful and didn't try to slap my butt or look at me sexual all the time like other guys. I was always a pretty girl so I had trouble with guys oversexualizing me and I always felt like a piece of meat, so when someone liked me for the real Kelsey and not my boobs and butt, I felt worth something and it made me like him. I think that's what made me catch feelings for him the most. After a few months of talking, it was the 3rd of July, and his family had a plan to go watch fireworks for the 4th of July. That day he asked me if I wanted to go with him to watch fireworks and of course I said I would love to! So on the 4th of July we went to a school field (where they had the fireworks at) and I watched the fireworks with him and it was special towards the end of us watching the fireworks because he went up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, then we left and sat in the back of his cousin's car and made out. Then, we got back to his aunt and uncle's house and they were doing more fireworks outside and we went inside the house. After we got in the house he went and sat on the couch, I sat on his lap, and we started kissing, we then went upstairs to his cousins room (he was in the room sleeping on the bed) and he laid the mattress out and put a sheet on it. We laid down and I was a virgin and never had sex before (I was scared) He said: "Are you sure you wanna do this?" and talked to me about it and checked about five or more times to be sure and to make sure I was comfortable, but I knew I was ready to finally lose my virginity so I said: “Yes I'm sure.” And he made sure I was comfortable every second of the way, which was special for me. Then he asked if I wanted to do it or him, (if you know what I mean, skip the gorey details) And I told him I wanted him to and he said: "Are you sure it's gonna hurt." And I said: "Yes I trust you to do it." And so we did, and he was kissing me the whole time, making sure I was comfortable and then I said: "I love you." he said: "Are you serious? That's the first time someone actually said they loved me first. But I love you too." And so it was really special, we both made it clear that we loved eachother and we were talking about how nobody has ever made us feel in that type of way and how we were in love with eachother, and it was with no exaggeration, magical. It was a such an amazing night, and I got up the next day and saw my mom had called, I had multiple missed calls, so I called my mom and told her we fell asleep and I needed her to come pick me up. (She didn't think anything weird at that point thank gosh!) So I got my things together and she picked me up, I was trying so hard to seem normal during the car ride and not awkward and got home and went up to my room. I immediately started pacing back and forth and didn't know whether to tell my mom or not and what to say, so I called my bestfriend at the time and she said "you need to tell your mom especially if you guys didn't use protection, (oops) because one time even can get you pregnant." So I took her advice even though I was scared and I told my mom I needed a Plan B pill. Her reaction was as bad if not worst than what I was afraid of. "You had sex?! Oh my gosh Kelsey what are you doing? You're following in my footsteps I can't believe you had sex." And I didn't know what to say other than telling her I'm sorry, it just happened and if she bought me a Plan B pill I would pay her back (I had a job) and she bought it for me, I took it and paid her back. When the shock weared off a little she also told me I should get on birth control so I set up a doctor's appointment and got on the pill. After that Allen and I were more serious, which is also the point red flags became more apparant, he started saying things that were off, and then it became more manipulative and almost abusive at times until his words would become abusive, he would get so angry he would even throw or punch things. It scared me so much to even be around him during these angry episodes, the most painful thing was I fell in love with what he wasn't which made it harder to leave. I didn't want abusive Allen, I wanted the knight in shining armor that made me feel like no other guy made me feel. I fell in love with his mask, not him, and that was already the biggest betrayl. He lied to me about who he was from the beginning, the mask seemed so real, how was I supposed to know as naive as I was? And he didn't show me who he really was until it was too late, I was so in love with his mask that I would only see in spiratic, short moments in between his angry outbursts and abusive behaviors. His wallpunching became almost physical with me at times and eventually did, I'm lucky to have been a scrapper. Fortunate enough for that I was able to fight him off, and wasn't scared. But the knight in shining armor I thought I was in love with, lifted up the mask and revealed that he was an ugly, abusive, insecure man. He eventually would start to call me horrible, hurtful names like "whore", "slut", and "bitch". And he would also say horrible things like: "I hope you get molested again, and raped." I was horrifyed but stayed because he brainwashed me to believe other guys would be "worst" and abuse me even though it couldn't get much worst than what I was already settling for. I also believe that between all the trauma he put me through, and me still holding on to this fantasy and being in love with his mask and hoping he would change and what I fell in love with would magically reappear, it created an unhealthy trauma bond attachment that he disguised and excused as "love" and that made it almost impossible to leave along with all of the abusive tactics he used to control me such as threatening to "kill himself" if I left, stalking all of my coworkers, family, mutual friends, etc to try and get in contact with me and drove people nuts and some people completely out of my life. I lost some of my best friends at the time, some who actually truly cared, which broke my heart and I never fully forgave myself for awhile for letting him get in between me and all the good friends I truly loved, I was always so liked and popular, but his craziness is enough to send any sane person over the edge and then some, so I had no harsh feelings, I respected it and loved them from a distance and cherished the good times we had and apprectiated them being so loving with me even when I wasn't so lovable, that's unconditional love. They tried, Allen just drove everyone in sight and out of sight completely insane when it came to me. He was obsessed. I came to the desperate conclusion the only way to "lose" him was to sleep with another guy even though I never had before and didn't want to, the thought honestly made me so uncomfortable, but I knew this needed to end I was hardly anything anymore but purely unhappy and miserable with him. Also, my intuition was telling me all of his excessive control and abuse was also a deflection because of what he was doing and wouldn't admit. I kept leaving him the whole entire time sometimes every single week from July 2015-Febuary 2017, and come to find out my intuition was correct. He was sleeping with 2 ex's, 3 coworkers at all his different jobs he kept leaving, some girls his friends knew, a "friend", a girl at the club he said he didn't go to with his friend and lied about, and everytime I would leave him or ask I got a blatant lie, or excuse and pulled back into the toxic mess by his manipulation tactics. So I finally partied with some acquaintances, and also slept with another guy that night. It somehow got back to him because females love stirring the pot and causing issues for me, being envious even though nobody cared to tell me when I was being lied to, or that I was right to leave him. They should’ve also mentioned the fact that I should have been COMPLETELY DONE with him, and about all the people he slept with. Long story short, we were done. But he had the audacity to sit on my step-dad's mower bawling his eyes out like a baby (like always) and he said: "Kelsey, I can't believe you did this to me now you're a h*e." Hmm forgot to mention the fact you're a serial cheater, and compulsive liar I see huh? And I told him: "So funny you say that because you would always have sex with other females and never once told me before I got back with you, so how does it feel? Atleast you know about this, get over it, I'm tired of you making me stay with you just to get abused and lied to, I deserve better, and after I'm completely done with you and work on myself I will find better one day and you'll be sorry." He begged multiple times for me back, and called my mom for awhile until she told him it's not good for my life and mental health, to leave me alone. So he finally did. I slept with all of his friends in anger for the hurt he caused me with no shame. I proceeded to hookup with him in 2018. (I wanted to get him back more, honestly had an evil masterplan..Ooops) Although we weren't together, he was so bitter he cut my hair. (I might have been asleep, not sure.) So I slept with another dude, and hooked up with him the same night. One day he said: “I got a truck and a new b*tch, and I don't wanna deal with you anymore." So I proceeded to tell him that I had a whole masterplan plotting on him to get him back, and I didn't actually want him and was infact using him too (oops) and I didn't give a single sh*t about what ugly, white trash b*tch he had sucking him off at the time, and that's why I f*cked his friend a day before I f*cked him which was the plan, and the night I went out drinking with friends I slept with another dude and then him. And he said: "I don't ever want to talk to you again." Okay? Bye, so about 6 months went by, I didn't talk to him, so he reached out on Facebook and asked to comeover and I was looking to hookup with someone that night anyways, so I said yeah. (Silly me) He cameover and then I didn't hear from him until about 6 months or so after that other than we hooked up occasionally. The last time I hooked up with him was in 2019, and I have no intention to even look his way again. But, that particular time it was right after my older brother on my dad's side died from gun violence. I was traumatized. He came over crying about the same girl he "left" me for when we were just hooking up in 2018. I got mad and told him to stop crying. I said that I was grieving a real life situation and I didn't wanna hear that horsesh*t, and to shut up, drink, and have a good time with me and his friends he brought or leave. At this point he was stressing me out, and although saying that didn't help much, I tried. We had sex three times, then he was trying to leave when I still wanted to chill with the people he brought over. So I got mad when I realized he was leaving and swung open the door and told him to get the f*ck out of the car. I was so p*ssed because you don't just come and go to an Italian person's house, it's rude. He’s definitely not the first person I cussed out over that type of rude behavior. And he said: "What the heck are you doing?! Stop pulling me out of the car." And I said no, I was mad and wanted to fight him for disrespecting me especially after losing a loved one. I said: "You just come over, cry the whole time, cause issues after my brother's death and leave, I don't even know why I had you come over then. All you've ever done for me is cause issues, I should've known it would be the same thing this time too, typical." Then we probably got into it a little, I told him he owed me money from last time I let him borrow money for lunch. I grabbed his wallet and he said: "What are you doing?" I said: "You owe me money." And grabbed it right out of his wallet, but ended up and gave it back, and I was so p*ssed, I told him to never come back or talk to me again. That he disrespected me for the very last time. I only seen him one other time outside my job, he was next door. He saw me waiting in my ride's car to say something to him, but before he even walked outside I saw a red truck pull up with a female driving it and he hopped right in. (p*ssy) But I still said my piece: "Ding, ding, ding you won a liar and a cheater! Make sure your dog stays on his leash and off my damn doorstep next time h*e or imma beat his *ss." And luckily, I never saw him again..(So far, and hopefully it stays that way). I finished school and graduated with my 3.98 GPA in 2017, got some college done for my Associates of Science and Business Administration through Colorado Technical University online (20+/90+ credits), and have yet to go back. I’m also planning to go to Cosmetology school, get my license, and start my own business. After I was done with Allen I started partying a lot, I only drank and used pot at times, I never did any hard drugs. I had fun most of the time, I always have been the life of the party. But one particular time I went to my friend’s grandma/aunt's house, it was a beautiful house and it looked like they had atleast decent money in a small village-like town. I initially was brought by one of her male friend's, I brought my own bottle just to be safe because people I didn't know would be there I was told. But she said all of the people were "cool", and I figured that she would have my back if stuff went down. So people start coming, none that I actually knew, except her and my ride to the party. Everyone finally gets there and starts drinking more, and I hadn't even drank that much at that point. A guy then gives me a drink I'm pretty sure I was forced to drink and it had a date rape drug in it and I remember a little time passing after that I started being more out of it and a guy says: "what are you doing?" and I remember feeling hot and starting to fall out and people trying to tell me to go upstairs, but I couldn't hardly think with whatever they gave me. I remember hearing the girl that I came with helping me upstairs, and I was trying to block the door off when I got to the room, but there wasn't anything to put in front of it. The next memory I have was someone was telling me to lay down, then I was in the room with the guys before I completely fell out. The girl that invited me to the party came in and they screamed at her to leave and threatened her, I'm pretty sure. I don't remember anything except when I started to wake up. I remember someone grabbing and holding me down when the effects of the drugs started to wear off, and one of the guys making me go downstairs and the other coming down and I said: "I gotta go to the bathroom." And he said no and I'm pretty sure I was still under the effects of the drugs or I would've fought him. He wouldn't let me go upstairs and he assaulted me and video recorded it while the other guy stood there, did nothing and watched. After that, the girl that invited me to the party was sweeping pot off the floor freaking out and saying: "Everybody needs to leave or my grandma is gonna call the police." So I walked to the library, traumatized and waited for my ride. I couldn't believe it and my mind blocked it out. I got raped that night by three different guys, another time I got raped by two other guys when I was unconsious with this girl. Luckily I've had therapy for all of my unfortunate trauma. My grandpa was the first and only person I told for the longest time, and he helped me whenever I needed to talk or had panic attacks. When the situation happened to me as a child, him and my grandma also stepped up to help guide my mom and told her I was too young to be in the hospital and something else would happen if she didn't remove me from the hospital. And they offered me so much guidance and unconditional love throughout the years. They believed in me above all else, and taught me my true worth, strength, and resilience through everything, I truly wouldn't be this good and wouldn't have accomplished all of the things I did over the years if it weren't for them keeping me grounded and focused no matter what. That's a gift of a lifetime. Without them I wouldn't of believed that you can do anything you set your mind to, or believed in myself especially with all my trauma and issues, they taught me true resilience and that nothing is impossible if you set your mind to it and really try to get the goal accomplished. By the time I got my 3.98 GPA my grandma was already gone but watching over me smiling, and my grandpa was so proud. I also thanked him and my mom in my graduation speech. It was such a special, happy moment. Another huge step was a week before my 19th birthday, I had to start to get on my feet so I decided to go to the homeless shelter approximately 45 minutes away from my hometown and I moved in and got two different jobs within two to three weeks and was working fulltime for the whole time I was there. I was there for the duration of a few months, and finally got the key to my first apartment! I was finally free to be happy in my own sanctuary, I had a few adjustments to adult life, but I think at 21 I finally got the hang of it somewhat. I learned about budgeting, bills, credit and adulting so fast. My grandpa and bestfriend passed in 2018 when I was still working on getting my own place, but I'm sure he would be so proud of how much I've grown and is smiling down over me in heaven. It's been a long, hard journey, but every step of the way has been completely worth it and I wouldn't change it for the entire world because I needed it to become who I am! I've realized that sometimes you don't get dealt all the best cards, but you have to use what you have, and reshuffle for a better outcome. I’ve also learned, just because you feel like you've lost so much due to years of trauma doesn't mean you can't become successful and build a beautiful life for yourself! I hope my resilience, struggles, and accomplishments can inspire someone. You are able and worth it! Your past troubles are not your fault, and doesn't define you. What you do with your struggles defines you. When something happens in your life you have three choices to choose from: To let it ruin you, define you, or strengthen you. Let it strengthen you like I did. We are all survivors of some horrific nightmare we wanted to wake up from. My whole life seemed like a nightmare until I really started to push to the top harder, and want success. I had to realize I am able and deserve it, maybe more than anybody else in this world. And I've gotten it so far, and will continue to get it. Be a survivor, because the way I look at it is, you went through that horrible life event and lived. You didn't die, so you're a survivor of that. Just like someone can get in a car accident and survive. They are a survivor of that, trauma is the same no matter what kind. So above all other things keep being strong, and showing the world you are a survivor, and remember, you are in control of your own success story. I'll be rooting for you!
I want to stop using this year. To kick it, for real. I know I say that every year, but this year, it’s for real-real. So many of my pals had gone before, you know. They just faded or ended up turning bright blue in someone’s bathroom or coming to an end on the street or a bar. I’ve been lucky for too long and know that I’ve run my luck. I can’t breathe right and I’m real hot.
What kind of world You just plead for your idea of perfect harmony served to you after someone stuffed a napkin in your shirt and checked with all your hopes and dreams first
The next part was to pick up the paintbrush. But she was nervous. What was new? She always seemed to be nervous. She would shake when she had to do something important. Her lip would quiver when speaking in front of groups of people. She would feel a bitter cold when having to do anything that required even just the tiniest amount of courage.
My mom always told me to splash cold water on my face after I had been crying. I suspect this is because that's what her mother told her. In turn, I have told young people I love this same advice as a helpful tip on how to hide one's shame.