Everything will be okay
Part one: feeling okay on the not good day’s
DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN AN EXPERT IN MENTAL HEALTH OR ANYTHING ELSE. THIS IS A GENTLE REMINDER KIND OF DEAL RATHER THAN SOLID PSYCHOTHERAPY. I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL I JUST CARE A LOT.
So, when I got the idea to write this I was excited. I could write down everything I’ve learned, every trick and tip to get through the bad days everyone has to face. I could be funny and smart and it would be great. But then my laptop wouldn’t turn on. No matter, I thought, I can just write some notes for it.
Now here I am, for the first time writing this, and it's on a bad day. Which is kind of fitting. How can what I say be honest if it always comes from my good days? Maybe it’d be more positive, maybe it would’ve been better if my laptop had worked that first night. But it didn’t. Because things don’t always work out the way you want them to, and things don’t always come along right when you hope they will. And that’s okay. As long as you don’t immediately give up every time something goes south, it will be okay. Really.
How to feel okay on the not so good days
Firstly, get up and clean yourself up. Have a bath or shower, brush your hair and your teeth, change into clean clothes. If the shower is too much, at least try to wash your face and teeth and get dressed. Even if those clothes are pyjamas you will feel ten times better when you don’t smell like a wheelie bin.
Stop putting pressure on yourself to be productive. You’ll never get anything done if you’re focusing on everything at once. Pick small tasks to do and do them at your own pace. Sometimes it’s overwhelming thinking of all the things that need to get done and it seems like if you can’t do it all there’s no point. Doing a little is better than stressing yourself and getting nothing done.
Have something to eat. It can be anything, just make sure you eat. Your body is like a car, and if you don’t put fuel in you’ll start to have problems. And while you’re at it have something to drink, preferably water, but we won’t crucify you if all you can manage is a fizzy drink or juice or something. Just get some hydration in you okay? Honestly the curative powers of hydration are crazy.
Sit and really focus on the good things in your life. Sometimes all the negatives are all you can think of but really really try. You are loved, you are important. Even if the only one who knows it is your pet. Someone believes in you with all their heart, even if it’s only me. I believe in you with everything I have. And I’ve got gcses and stuff so clearly I’m smart and you should listen to me. Obviously.
Do something you enjoy doing. If none of your usual hobbies are holding your interest, force yourself to do something you find fun. Put a movie on, listen to some music (preferably not a sad song or film.. We’re trying to feel good here) read something or draw. Take pleasure in whatever you can.
Sometimes, the best we can do on our worst days is survive it. Sometimes, it’s okay if all you did was breathe. So when it’s that kind of day, be gentle with yourself. Treat yourself how you would treat a loved one in your position, with compassion and kindness. You can get through this, but it’s a hell of a lot easier when you don’t have to fight yourself every step of the way. You deserve kindness and compassion. Most of all from yourself.