Don't Kill Yourself Today

Sometimes life just sucks, and when you least expect it, it gives you a surprise punch to the gut. And on days like today, you might start questioning the universe and considering alternative exit strategies. Believe me, we've all been there. In fact, I've had my own battles with suicidal thoughts a few times this year.

And I know that today might seem like the perfect day to call it quits, but let's be real here. Who has time for that? Not you. 

Tomorrow at noon is probably a better time.

Oh, wait, scratch that. Noon tomorrow might not be the best choice after all. It's going to be scorching hot (or teeth-chattering cold, depending on when you're reading this), and you don't want to go out looking like a melted ice cream cone.

Hmm, perhaps next week Tuesday is a better time. Nothing interesting happens on Tuesday anyway.

Ok, that's settled. Next week Tuesday it is.

Oh, Tuesday happens to be an unlucky day. No need for sources; just believe me on this one. Hmmm, this is getting tricky.

Tell you what, while I figure out what's a good day to intentionally kick the bucket, why not try out some of the following to keep you busy until that day?

Watch a funny animal video

You can't cash in your chips without watching at least one last funny animal clip! Maybe contact friends or family members and see if they have any videos or pictures of their pets they want to share.

Additionally, there are many pages on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter dedicated to cute and funny animal clips. Honestly, you could probably spend a whole month just going through the pictures. But would that really be so bad?

If you're looking for a place to start regarding funny animal videos, you can always check out my favourite clip from YouTube. It's only 41 seconds, and you will crack up almost as much as the news anchor!

Dance alone in your room

What is Love? It's dancing to the best of the 1990s. After all, there's something so freeing about putting on some great music and dancing like nobody's watching.

The only question is, what track are you going to pick? Dance hits of the 90s, 80s rock songs, or perhaps Motown's greatest hits?

Head outside

Hang out on your porch, sit on a park bench, or find a spot in your community garden and enjoy a slow moment outdoors. Listen to the birds, gaze up at the sky, or just rock in place for a few peaceful moments.

Brew a nice cup of tea 

As you're waiting for the day to bite the dust, it couldn't hurt to create a tea ritual in the meantime. Consider selecting a special mug or teapot that you enjoy using. Set aside a specific time each day to brew a cup of tea and make it a part of your routine.

Whether it's enjoying a cup of tea in the morning to start your day or taking a break in the afternoon to unwind, creating a tea ritual can be a powerful tool for improving well-being. Plus, the thrill of discovering new flavours and blends will keep your routine captivating and ignite the spirit of exploration and adventure within you.

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus, French writer

And if you are looking for exploration and adventure outside of your kitchen, then look no further than France's Salon Proust. Step into a realm of opulence, where plush furnishings and warm ambience embrace you like an old friend. Here, amidst the company of cherished books and exquisite decor, immerse yourself in an afternoon tea fit for royalty. With every sip of the finest brews, you'll find yourself transported to the picturesque landscapes of a whimsical French afternoon.

Furthermore, if you want to truly experience magic, head over to the picturesque mountain town of Jiufen, Taiwan, during the twilight hours. Watch as the countless tea shops hidden within the winding alleys and lanes bring the once-quiet streets to life with their twinkling lights. There are so many tea rooms to choose from that it could be hard to pick your favourite. Thankfully, there's no law that says you can't have more than one favourite!

And if tea isn't your cup of… well, tea, fear not. You can substitute tea for coffee. Just remember to beware of sipping on this invigorating elixir too late in the day, especially if you plan on sleeping at night!

Watch your favourite movie 

Of course, you can't leave without watching your favourite show or movie one last time.

But this won't be an ordinary viewing experience. Nope! This is going to be epic. So gather all the fluffiest cushions, cosiest pillows, and snuggest blankets and construct the epitome of ultimate fortresses to indulge in the hilarity of Home Alone, the enchantment of The Lion King, or even the endless laughter of every single episode of Mr. Bean.

Oh, and don't forget the popcorn.

Start a hobby 

Start a hobby just for you. Don't make stuff to monetize it, and don't feel like you need to share it on the internet. Whether it's making mosaics, figure drawing, yoga, robotics, creating comic strips, or juggling, the list is endless!

Wear your favourite outfit

Do you have a favourite pair of jeans or a comfy sweater that always makes you feel good? Well, tomorrow, or even 5 months from now, is the perfect day to wear it. Dressing in your favourite clothes can instantly boost your mood and make you feel confident and happy. So, go ahead, put on your best outfit, paint your nails, and strut your stuff!

Yep, life can be a rollercoaster of emotions, full of twists and turns, bumps and bruises, highs and lows. It's a journey that tests our will, our character, and our resilience. At times, it can be overwhelming, and we may find ourselves lost in the darkness. But there is always hope, and it's something we should never let go of.

Oh, and after extensive research, I've discovered it's considered very unlucky to kick the bucket before Sunday, September 10, 2186.