Bullying We Are Surprisingly Okay With

So, I was watching this Cracked video on 4 types of bullying that we're surprisingly okay with and I remembered the way that bullying is something that I had to work through throughout my life; both as it was happening and dealing with its after effects.

Bullying, for many people, can be a catalyst that sparks a spiral of bad mental health episodes that can traumatise anyone for the rest of their life.

William Copeland, Ph.D. of Duke University, did a study on the effect of bullying and it turns out that bullying victims are 14 times more likely to develop panic disorders, 5 times more likely to develop depressive disorders and 10 times more at risk of suicidal behaviours and tendencies.

You can get more information below from NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health):

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2013/bullying-exerts-psychiatric-effects-into-adulthood.shtml

My social anxiety developed a lot from the bullying that I endured through in secondary school, teenage boys that didn't know how to behave towards girls (I had to move classes due to the harassment that I suffered).

I also have a lot of self-esteem issues from the bullying that I got in primary school, which was more to do with jealous girls that wanted to tear me down so they could have the spotlight.

I never really got over either of those two experiences, with a lot of my disordered thinking stemming from the internalised feelings that I bottled up back then. I tried to suppress a lot of the memories I had from that time in my life (I didn't really enjoy school for the most part, so it didn't bother me) but unfortunately, by pushing those feelings down into my subconscious, they've come out in another way later down the line.

My personal favourite example of this is my problem with displaying my talents to others. I find it incredibly difficult to show other people what I make (music, art, literature, etc.) because I'm deathly afraid that they will want to hurt me because of it. Granted, there is an edge of rejection fear that's mixed in with it but it's mostly because I'm afraid that people won't be happy with me if I do something, regardless of how good it is.

There's a lot of other quirks to my disorder that stem from these experiences but I was also lucky enough to have grown up with a fair disinterest in mainstream and social media. I went to school during the rise of social media and I tried my best to stay away to avoid more bullying and scrutiny from my peers.

My younger sister, on the other hand, had to endure the brunt of it during school and found that it was even easier for her peers to bully and harass her both in and out of school. She also suffers with an array of mental health issues that stem from her experiences.

Social media has given bullies a perfect media to harass their victims and the internet will join in the fun! Making the bullying go from a situational problem that could be addressed by the authority figures in the given environment (teachers at school, managers at work, etc.) to an immovable problem that permeates every aspect of the victim's life.

Most people think that bullying isn't something that lingers with people into adulthood but it's simply not true. In fact, if people bothered to listen to children, they would realise that bullying can be incredibly traumatising for the victims and because people don't take bullying very seriously, it gets left unchecked and festers into unhealthy behaviours.

My advice for those that are being bullied or were bullied?

Acknowledge that it's happening, don't forget it and don't try to suppress it. Find the cause and accept that it's something that happened. Try to understand why it's happening. Give yourself time to process it as it's happening and tell people. Tell anyone that will listen.

Bottle these things up and the research can tell your future.

The more we acknowledge and talk about things, the more we will be forced to deal with it.