Body image and social media

A lot of people nowadays are suffering from eating disorders, sleep issues, depression and anxiety. More than 50% of those problems are related to social media and cyber-bullying. We live in the world where the amount of likes and comments under our photos indicates how worthy we are. We live for the appreciation from others. The question is why? Why do we do that to ourselves?

Personally, I was one of those people. I was feeling so depressed when my photo didn't get more than twenty likes and I stupidly felt like nobody cares about me. I just felt unseen. I used to get angry at my mum when she was trying to tell me that it's okay not to receive likes or comments because that doesn't make you less beautiful or less special. But I didn't listen. I thought she didn't understand what it's like to be a little mouse in the ocean of big sharks. I felt ugly and underappreciated. As my teenage self, I didn't want to understand that the likes weren't the most important things in life. I wanted to believe that people love me for the way I look. I was glued to my phone constantly refreshing my page to see if I have any more likes. I even searched the web for the hashtags that get the most likes so I can add it to the photos of my face. But that's where the problem was.

After couple of years of struggling with my body image I learned so many things about how social media have this weird affect on me. And let me tell you, it had me in its claws for a long time. I decided to make a little list of things I could do for myself to prevent feeling bad about how I look. It's pretty easy to follow and it changed my life for better.

First things first I unfollowed every person on every social media that was making me feel bad about my body. We all have those, whether it's on Instagram or Facebook. There's always some people that will say some things, hurting you deeply and that's why you should get rid of them. I don't need negativity in your life. Instead, I tried to follow people who inspire me, who give me confidence to be myself. Right now I follow so many females on Instagram and they give me so much love and happy thoughts. I surround myself with positivity!

I discovered a little more than a year ago that I unconsciously was talking badly to myself whenever I looked in the mirror. "Oh my Lord, my belly is huge", "I look like an elephant", "Why did you eat this KFC for dinner today? You'll look like a parade balloon soon". And it wasn't something I knew I was doing. It was happening in my mind and then I was feeling sad and I didn't know why. Well, THAT'S EXACTLY WHY! Negative self-talk is something that's called 'inner critic'. And mine was born when my parents used to tell me that I am big and I have to lose weight. I remember trying so hard to lose weight just to please them but after long six years I decided to listen only to myself. It's something that we should be aware of, so try to listen to your thoughts and change them to something positive every time they are trying to bring you down.

Many times in my life I was scrolling through Instagram and I would say "I wish I had body like her" or "I wish my hair looked so pretty". Comparing yourself to other people is a number one mistake you're doing every day. There's nobody else that looks like you. You're unique, you're special, you are writing your own beautiful so why comparing yourself to other people? You have to resist the thoughts that say that you're not enough, because you are. YOU ARE ENOUGH. As I said, I was a teenage girl who was feeding off of likes and comments on her social media because I thought that other people's approval is something I need to feel beautiful. I know that there are people like me and maybe they're not aware of it but I'm here to tell you - stop focusing your energy on Instagram likes and Facebook comments. Stop trying so hard to put the right hashtags under your photos so you'll get more of them. Stop researching "how to get more followers" on Google because the amount of followers you have right now is enough. Likes don't validate your beauty. They don't validate your worth and they certainly don't validate you as a person.

What I find useful, whenever I start to feel bad about myself - I close the applications on my phone or turn my phone off. It's good for your mental health to take a break from social media. Instead, try to read a book or write in your journal. Try to find something that makes you happy and positive and focus on it. Your world is not contained in your phone and you will see that you missed so many things around you because your nose is constantly before your smartphone. Social media aren't the most important thing. You don't have to update it everyday, you don't have to upload pictures constantly. Focus on things around you, try to see world differently.

In conclusion, I think social media is not the most important thing in the world. We can live without it. The amount of likes or comments don't establish your value and certainly are not something we should look at as the beauty-meter. So put away your phone, stand in front of the mirror and look at your body in all its glory. You're beautiful. And no one can ever change that.