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Be(a)ware the Energy Vampire

by Nadia Iris 5 months ago in selfcare
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Draining energy instead of blood

Disclaimer: This article is only for those who are ready and are willing to understand and/or make real changes to their own energy. Do not read if you are unwilling to accept some controversial material. 

You’ve probably heard the term “Energy Vampire” at some point in your life and then been either too afraid or too uninterested to research more about it. That’s cool. But if you are interested in such a concept, then read on. 

Throughout this article, I will explain what an Energy Vampire is, how to go forward if there are energy vampires in your life and (by far the most unpopular concept to grapple with…) if you are, indeed, possibly, maybe, an energy vampire yourself. 

Let’s begin by asking ourselves the following questions. You have only to answer yes or no. 

  1. Have you ever felt like someone is following you? 
  2. Do you sometimes feel tired/drained for “no real reason”? 
  3. Does a thought about a particular person keep coming up in your mind no matter how hard you try to get rid of it? 
  4. Have you ever been happily living your life and all of a sudden feel a wave of unease or a shudder come over you as a particular person comes into your mind? 

If you’ve answered yes to all, or even one, of these questions, then it is more likely than not that you have an energy vampire/s in your life. 

This is no cause for concern. I assure you that you are safe and that there are ways to release the hold of these energy drainers easily. However, it is important that you become aware of these energies if you’d like to do anything about it. 

Everything in this universe is vibration. This is not (only) a spiritual concept. This has now been proven by science. Vibration is energy in motion. Therefore, everything is energy. Everything. When you know this, it is easy to see (and more importantly - feel) the different energies all around you. The more sensitive you become, the easier it is. 

For example:

  • A strong oak tree with lively green leaves blowing in the wind on a warm summer’s day - high vibration. 
  • A dark alleyway where people engage in negative actions - low vibration. 

And you can feel it. You can feel it when you walk near the tree, you feel a sense of calm and peace. You feel you can breathe easy.  And you can feel it when you walk through the alleyway, even in the day, even if it’s empty. You feel uncomfortable or strange. You look over your shoulder. It’s a vibe

Now that you’re aware that energy is everything and everything is energy, you should also know that energy can never be destroyed. It only transforms. That’s why you can still “feel the vibe” even after the “dodgy things” that have happened the night before in the alleyway. It’s not happening "now", but you can still feel it. That’s because energy exists always. And it can (and does) linger. But that also means it can be TRANSFORMED and this is the focus of this article - how to transform the negative energy in your life. 

Energy is either high vibrational or low vibrational. This has to do with the intentions, emotions and thoughts that “go into” the action. Is the action that’s taking place coming from fear, anger, desperation, despair, guilt, or is it coming from sincerity, kindness, love and appreciation? Whatever you put into the action, it will be reflected. This is the golden rule. What you sow, you reap. What you give, you get. But you already knew that :) 

Okay, so we know energy is vibration and that vibration can be low or high. Now we need to understand that thought is vibration. The quality of the thoughts you think are either in vibrational harmony with love or fear. The thoughts then create the emotion that “goes with it” and your e-motion (energy-in-motion) is projected outward and then the universe must match this. It is Law. A Universal Law. The Law of Attraction, the Law of Reflection, The Law of Mirroring… however you want to put it. 

Now we know that thought is vibration, we can easily see how someone projecting negative thoughts in your direction may have an impact in your life. 

An energy vampire, very simply, is someone who is focusing on you in a negative way.

This may be through/by any of the following: 

  1. Projecting negative thoughts towards you 
  2. Drawing on your energy when they are around you 
  3. Speaking about you negatively to others 
  4. Imagining negative scenarios about you 
  5. Sabotaging your success by projecting negative outcomes 
  6. Creating problems for your solutions 
  7. Focusing negatively on your possessions, relationships, properties 
  8. Projecting emotions of jealousy or envy onto you 
  9. Manipulation 
  10. Fakeness (having one persona towards you and yet another to others)

So no, the energy vampire in your life does not look like Dracula and cannot only come out in the nighttime. The energy vampire looks like me or you. A normal human. However, it is very important to note that most energy vampires are VERY unaware of what they are doing. They live their lives rather unconsciously, projecting negativity without noticing it at all. It’s their unconscious beliefs/ego that drives them. This makes it easier for us to shift the blame we feel towards them, onto the only real solution, which is the power that lies within US

In other words, the longer we blame these people for “draining our energy”, the more time they have to drain it. By focusing on them, we are giving them what they want. That alone should make you realize you need to shift your focus. 

So… how do we deal with an energy vampire? 

First things first: Regain your power. If they’re not aware of their own thoughts, projections and emotions, so be it. This is not your problem. You have not come to this planet to save anyone. Everyone walks their own paths and has their own internal guidance. Always remember this. 

Once you have focused back to yourself, to the I AM that lies within, now you can begin to shift the energy inside. Already now, with this awareness, no outside energy can enter. Because your focus is not “sloppy” and therefore there are no “blind spots” in your auric field for negative energy to enter through.  You stand strong in your Awareness of Self and are therefore unmoved by the thoughts and actions of others. 

This is a very important point to note: No one can affect you without YOU ALLOWING them to. The only way it can seem like you have no choice in the matter is if you are UNAWARE of the choice you have. But I am here to tell you that you do, indeed, have a choice. Every moment. You need only be aware of it. 

Here are some ways you can enforce (and make sure you stand strong in) your own energy: 

  1. Breathe. Consciously. Sit for however long, however many times a day (even for just a moment if that’s all you can do) and focus on your breath. There is a REASON this is the number one technique all “spiritual self-help teachers” teach. Simply put - it brings you back to YOU!
  2. Find a connection within to the universe. Whatever that means for you. Call it whatever your heart desires. But feel it. Feel it when you walk past flowers or feel the wind on your face. Feel it in your beating heart. This connection to the Natural World will increase the relationship to yourself. And who knows, maybe one day you will realize that there is no real difference between the outside world and yourself at all ;) 
  3. Visualize love. Most people like to use a white light. But use your mind’s eye to see this energy. And then project it. Project love outwards. First use it for yourself. Imagine yourself being surrounded by this light. And then send it outwards. Start with loved ones, and then move towards cities and countries and then the whole planet! And if you’re really feeling frisky, send that love light out into the whole cosmos! Why not? :) 

When you begin practicing these techniques, you will feel something open up inside. Something magical will unlock within. And with this raised vibration, there is absolutely no chance for any negative energy projected by “energy vampires” to enter. In fact, you’ll forget they even exist! 

It was Coco Chanel who said, “I don’t care what you think about me. I don’t think about you at all.” 

And this is absolutely true! At least for someone who has come into alignment with their own True Power. 

Now here’s the part where you’ll have to be brutally honest with yourself… It’s very easy to see how someone else may be projecting negative energy onto you… but how willing are you to admit that you may be projecting negative energy onto someone else? Now before you start shifting in your seat, becoming agonizingly uncomfortable, remember that the first step to regaining your power is awareness, and the second step is HONESTY. If you have been projecting negative energy onto someone else because you have been unaware of the choices you have, THAT’S OKAY. It was Jesus who said, “Forgive them for they know not what they do”. It’s okay. We all make mistakes. We all do things for our own gain. We are all (innately) selfishly focused and do what we think is best. It’s okay. But if you want real change in your life, in your energy, in your perception of the world, then you have to admit that this is so. Only then can you begin to TRANSFORM. 

What to do if you have been an energy vampire: 

  1. Admit and acknowledge
  2. Forgive yourself 
  3. Whenever that person/those people who you have been projecting negative energy towards come up, project that love light (the one we spoke of earlier) onto them instead. This is how you transform the energy. Focus, rather, on the light. It’s that simple. 
  4. Focus your attention on YOURSELF instead. Your heart is a good place to start
  5. Catch yourself in the act and make a change in REAL TIME 
  6. Ask yourself: Why am I wishing them “bad”? Why do I want what they have? (What you’ll notice is that it’s never [ever ever ever] really about them. It’s all a reflection of the things going on inside YOU)
  7. Let. It. Go. Once you begin focusing on yourself and your inner world, you’ll lose interest in thinking about others and will therefore not have the need to project anything onto them. Except love. Love is always a good idea. 

What to do if you are face to face with an energy vampire and can’t get away: 

  1. Accept the moment (always remember: what you RESIST persists) 
  2. Set clear boundaries (do this in your mind’s eye as telling them will only make them angry). Imagine a white bubble of light around you, one that their energy cannot permeate through. 
  3. Smile at them. Energy vampires are usually people who complain a lot, so whenever they bring up a problem or a negative story, diffuse it. I like to say things like: 
  • Ah well, everything has a way of working out in the end 
  • Everything happens for a reason 
  • If darkness exists, then so too must there be light 
  • It’s probably just a sign to show you something you’re missing 
  • Thank you for your opinion. I respect that you have a right to your perspective but I strongly believe that there is no way that you know better for me than I know for myself 

4. Don’t give in. Chances are, the moment you come into your power will be the moment they try even harder to drain you. This is normal as you are simply just cutting off their supply. Be prepared for them to act even more harshly. They may say things like:

  • You’re being selfish 
  • How do you know?/Who are you to say this? 
  • You’re too idealistic and live in a fantasy world 
  • Come back to reality

I can assure you that I have been told this over and over again. The key is to stand strong in your power - they will eventually get bored and move onto someone else’s energy they can get access to. 

5. Things might spiral. Especially if you have been giving these people your energy for a long time. They might create scenarios where you are “forced” to help them (and therefore let your guard down and let them in). This is a tricky one. In a world and a time where COMPASSION is a necessary ingredient in the creation of the New Earth, it is extremely difficult to differentiate between actually being compassionate/kind and being a crutch for someone’s victimhood. I’ll be honest, I’m still exploring this one. Finding new and better ways everyday to learn the difference. What’s helped me so far is saying things like: 

  • I choose to see you in your glory 
  • Joining your problem only feeds more energy into the problem, I prefer to hold energy towards the solution 
  • These are the ways in which I can help you (state ways) but I cannot compromise my own authenticity and integrity for your benefit 

Things that go without saying (but that you need to hear) to keep your energy high:

  1. Drink lots of water - projecting positive emotion onto the water (it is also scientifically proven that water holds memory and reacts to the emotions projected towards it) 
  2. Get lots of rest (my personal favorite…) 
  3. Be creative! (Very NB! We are creators at our core and so activating creativity begins to activate the relationship with the True Self). Ways to be creative: 
  • Write
  • Paint
  • Draw 
  • Sing 
  • Dance 
  • Build 
  • Cook 
  • Design 
  • Create fun imaginary scenarios/fantasies 
  • Play

(Do this without the intention of having anyone else - other than yourself - see these creations. If it comes up to share, cool! Otherwise, you’re being creative for the sake of being creative!) 

4. Sit with your eyes closed at least once a day (this doesn’t necessarily have to be cross legged with an erect back). Do it when you feel it’s time.

I stood by the lake in my area recently. Just taking in the water. Next thing I knew, my eyes were closed and I was breathing in and out, matching the soft current of the water. It was only after a while I realized my hands were in a prayer position - a natural effect of the gratitude I was feeling. My point is, this can happen anywhere! Whenever, wherever. Just feel it. 

5. Practice appreciation. This is the number one way to ensure you are in a high vibrational state. You have a lot to be thankful for. Just look for it.

To sum up: 

  • Energy vampires are not bad people. They are simply unaware of what they are doing. 
  • You, yourself might be an energy vampire and that’s okay. Take the steps to transform. 
  • What you give, you get. If you project negativity, you will receive negativity. It can be no other way.
  • Everything is energy, either low vibrational or high vibrational depending on the intention. 
  • No one (and nothing) can project negativity onto you unless you allow them to.
  • When you catch yourself projecting negativity, ask yourself… Why? And then accept the answer and make a change in the moment
  • Take steps to raise your vibration. 

The point of understanding all of this is to understand that negativity does exist. And so does positivity. But more than both of these, awareness exists. Being AWARE of positive and negative energy is the point. There is no need to judge a negative circumstance or a negative person. It just is. And neither is there a need to praise a positive person or circumstance, it just is. Be aware of all of it. You are all of it. You have both dark and light within you. There is no need to cast out the darkness. As a matter of fact - you cannot. The shadows of darkness within you are but the parts of yourself you are not aware of. That’s all. The point is to become aware of these parts. Accept them. Love them. This is what it means to be whole. We’re not looking to be completely positive. This is impossible. We live in a world of polarity. We’re looking to be completely whole. To see the darkness within ourselves, to see the darkness within others and accept it. Diffuse it with love. Transform it with light. This is the point.


About the author

Nadia Iris

• I write from a place of sincerity •

Author of SHINE - Poems for the Awakened One (Coming 2022)

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