'back to the future' letter #notetoselfafterlockdown

Backstory...

Below is an entry I wrote as a mini time capsule diary a few weeks after the news of the pandemic in 2020. One year and a bit later, I am cleaning up my Google Drive and opened this document.

I'll let you in 'behind the scenes' of my life a few weeks before spilling out my feelings in the entry...

"So, you've heard - be careful. Don't go out too much. This is serious J."

Parents were being a little too over-dramatic don't you think?

Sure, I was aware. There was a few cases interstate but I was safe here in the land down below.

"Hmm, yeah I guess so mate. We're safe here."

I met up with my friend who needed some help running a youth program at her university. That's what she said above. She's usually right. I had faith in her gut feeling.

I remember I was drafting up my invoice.

What I didn't know that this would be my last invoice from that place.

And what you didn't know was that during this time my mind was a mad mess. I was madly accepting every small gig and Air-tasker type job to save up to move interstate to live that 'millennial' dream of living independently from my family of six plus my dog.

And I would need to let you know that as a second generation millennial kid with immigrant parents, I was feeling the pain of my moral Vietnamese responsibilities as the eldest daughter and sister.

It was fine, I thought. My head told me that life was aligning with my desires. Not long after, my inner critic hit in.

I heard the news on the advertisements on my Spotify that there were only five reasons to leave home.

• My goal to work and live interstate was thrown out the window.

• The bulk of my freelance gig work was cancelled (I was finishing up with a Casual community project #thankgoodnessforZoom)
• I finally decided to give DisneyPlus and UberEats a try.

At the end of the piece, I will enlighten you on the beautiful sides that I have taken away after a year or so ... most importantly, here is the time capsule I wrote to myself:

Dear 2005 Juju,

It is 2020 and I do not have good news.

Our prime minister has kept us in lockdown.

It is currently 2pm. I am at home and half in my PJ’s.

I just got off a Zoom meeting with my work peers.

Don’t worry, Zoom will be the norm for you soon.

#covid19 #selfiso

--

I know, you feel scared about technology.

But listen to me - technology is keeping us sane here.

Tell your teachers to move towards digital learning tools.

Build your skills in coding or content writing - be aware.

The world is changing rapidly here.

Prepare for virtual connection.

#wifi #generationconnect

--

Two weeks ago, I got rejected.

My short term contract work was cancelled.

Workplace got closed.

I got a call yesterday about the job I applied for online.

“Due to this uncertain period, we will let you know what will happen next.”

Good bye.

#gigeconomy #shortlistedfortheonemillionthtime

Yes, again this is 2020 Juju here.

I reapplied for government payments for the second time.

It says my claim is ‘being processed.’

Waiting for their call.

Does a two hour meeting for this week count as work?

#unemployed #casualworklife

--

I just woke up from a job alert notification.

Tick. Fourth job I applied for this week.

How will we do interviews when we can’t go outside?

I am safe at home though.

Thank goodness for living with parents #lifesavers

#socialdistancing #checkingthefridgeforthe10thtime

--

Dear Juju of 2025,

I hope in five years that you will not need government support payments anymore.

I hope you will have backup work when something like this happens.

I hope you work but also have time to spend time with family and friends.

#geny #millennialworkers

From Juju in 2021,

#prayforhumanity #thenextgen #findingmynextgig

P.S - ugh, masks is still mandatory and still on Centrelink. But, hey - Ubereats is doing well for us. #4thlockdowninAustralia

~

So, I was quite grumpy in the time I wrote this but I knew there was more to this despite the news, the racial attacks and all that.

The 2021 Juju is more at peace. I have decided to study another course after my four year gap year (another story for another time).

I feel grounded at home and my heart beams with thankfulness for my parents and siblings.

I use to think I can change and save the world but now, I think that I can only do with what I can.

I have decided to dust up, dispose most of my past and decide on my life with a bit more intentionality.

How about you?

We are one out of 7.8 billion people and counting -

What will be your drum beat to this story in this reality now?