Anxiety

Anxiety. A word that everyone knows of but, not all understand. What is anxiety? Well, there are multiple definitions of the word. For me, anxiety is always worrying about a situation that can be either big or small. Here are some examples of anxiety.

You are walking down the sidewalk when you feel the vibration of your phone. When pulled out, a notification for a texted messaged appeared on the screen. It was a simple text message so there is nothing wrong with opening it. But, when opening, the words you dreaded came into view. "When you are done with work we need to talk.." was on your screen. Your mood went from chipper to sad in an assistant. Your heart rate increases rapidly and you can hear it. Without realizing it, you stopped walking and stood still looking at your phone without moving. Thousands of thoughts rapidly hit you at once. Did I do something wrong? Did I say something that I shouldn't have? Am I in trouble? Why of all times to message me this? You try to brush it off and continue to work.

You try to keep your mind clear while at work but, the thought of that text message still lingers. And with that, the thoughts surround it and consumes you from the inside out. Work drags on and felt like it took forever. When it was finally the end of your shift your racing heart rate came back. With shaky hands, you message the person that sent you the text. They responded back with a I'll pick you up from work. Your heart rate quickens even more and your stomach starts to hurt. The feeling of throwing up lingers but you try your best to keep it down. Once outside you see their vehicle in sight. Taking a deep breath you walk to it and get in. Instead of looking at them, your head is down and you ask them what they wanted to talk about. It turns out to be something so small that it wasn't worth being worked up about it.

Anxiety something that messes up someone mentally and a lot of things can set it off. I know personally for me both being in a large group of people and speaking to an audience are big factors for me.

Imagine this, there is a ball game that you want to go to. Your feeling excited to go but, in the back of your mind you know there will be a lot of people there but, you try to push it from your mind since it's the game that you been waiting for. While driving, you get more excited to go. But, once you get there, a crowd is already formed outside the door. Your excitement goes down and not want to go. But, you paid a decent amount for these tickets and it would be a waste of money not to watch. You take a deep breath and head to the line. Everyone around you is laughing and carrying on while you stand there quietly. The feeling of discomfort surrounds you and the thought of leaving still lingers. You do your best to stay around and watch this game.

Once your inside you find the seat on your ticket. Right now there aren't many people around you, so you calm down and relax. But as time passed there are more people around you and the feeling of self-conscious floods your thoughts. Do I look ok? I hope I put on deodorant? All those thoughts flood your mind and you try not to be close to anyone. As the game begins you try your best to watch the game but, with all the people around you, it makes it difficult.

When it's down to the last 20 seconds of the game, you quickly get up from your seats and leave. You know that people will be up and moving around once the game is over. Leaving now would give you a head start out the door. Once you get to your car, all the fears from your anxiety go away and you can finally relax.

Nowadays, anxiety is a common thing you see. I know I'm not a professional in the field of psychology but, I have these types of issues and have issues with this. Some might say that it's something you need to "get over", but what they don't know is anxiety is deeper than they think.