A Letter to the Addict Still Suffering

Image By: Lauren Crawford - Image Retrieved From: Chiron A Medici Company - https://chironhealth.com/blog/treating-addictions-telemedicine/drugabuse-shutterstock272600351-people-holding-hands-feature-image-drug-addiction-treatment/

I used to be just like you.But if you looked at my life now, you wouldn't think so.I seem to have it all together. The important stuff, at least.

You see, I am what they call a recovering addict.One day, I hope that's what they call you too.One day, I hope you are the one on my side of the screen, writing your own letter to the addict who still suffers.But until that day comes, I am here to tell you that it's going to be okay. I know that's probably the last thing you want to hear, and I also know how cheesy and cliché that sounds, but it is the truth. Repeat after me: it is going to be okay. You are going to make it through this because you are strong, even if right now it doesn't feel like it.

The next thing I want to tell you is that you are not alone. Trust me, I remember. I remember the internal battle every single day, when you want to stop and don't want to stop all at the same time. I remember the sleepless nights, and puffy eyes from crying all too well. I remember the pain, the withdrawal, and the regret. I remember the guilt...how bad I felt about the pain I had caused my family. And I know that you feel the same pain too. I'm here to tell you that the pain goes away, even if the memories don't. The memories have to stay. Because once you get better, you need the memories around to remind you of the life you never want to go back to.

The next thing I'm going to tell you is to stop hating yourself. I know that you did not expect things to turn out this way. Nobody does. I remember my first week in treatment, we went to a class and the teacher said "go back to when you were a little kid, day dreaming about what you wanted to be when you grew up." I looked around the room and girls were reminiscing, smiles on their faces; and then the teacher said, "now raise your hand if you were thinking of a drug addict." Not a single hand went up. That's the thing. Nobody grows up thinking that they want to be a drug addict. I had big dreams, and that definitely wasn't one of them. You have dreams too. So just start chasing them and stop chasing the high. Everyone knows that you did not mean for things to turn out this way, so please learn to start forgiving yourself, because the self-hatred has to go if you want to make it through this. You have to realize that you are loved, you are worth saving, and you have a purpose. And sometimes the pain and the hardships we go through lead us directly to that purpose. Look at me. I would not be writing this to you right now if I did not go through what I went through. There is someone out there who needs you to be a success story; so if you won't do it for yourself, then do it for them.

I did it for you.

-Jaq

"The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places." -Ernest Hemingway

"What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Sometimes, we motivate ourselves by thinking of what we want to become. Sometimes, we motivate ourselves by thinking about who we don't ever want to be again." -Shane Niemeyer