Window

I slowly press my fingertips on the cold smooth surface of the glass as I’m peering in to watch you all joke and laugh

I tend to stay on the other side because if any of you knew the truth you’d leave me like everyone else with this hole in my chest a mile wide

I’m an outcast, a misfit, a black sheep but most of all I’m me: a wretched excuse for a person that most days I wish I didn’t have to be

No one specific has told me these lies it’s all in the mind of the reflection at the tip of my nose staring back into my eyes.

She’s always been here with me telling me who I am, the only difference is we used to be so lively now she tells me all the reasons I should be damned

It started with hands of the man wearing plaid, I know he was your friend but how could you let this happen you were supposed to be my dad

It was just a soft whisper after that night, little did I know that this was the start of my fight

These days it seems like she’s always screaming in my ears but, who can blame her with all we have been through over the years

I still entertain these forsaken moments from your late nights drinking to your dark omens

This evil has haunted me from place to place but it’s about time I stand my ground and stare fear back in the face

Back to the reflection of myself, on that old window sill were I’ve longed to be someone else

I’m ending this war inside us both its been too long and it’s time to let go

I’m done being alone in the open air I am the one in control of the voice beneath my hair

So I’m making my way to open this door it’s starting to rain out here and I deserve more