What is love?

As I lay my head down on my pillow my thoughts start to drift away as if I'm in a haze

You see I messed up... bad... I fell in love with another man

and to most that sounds like a dream but for me its agony

Yet I fell hard.. Sunk right into his arms

his deep brown eyes making me feel paralyzed

But I've been down this rocky road and know what it feels like to be alone

Then again maybe this time will be different or maybe I should try

as I feel my eyes start to be dry I cant help but think of all the lies

"I'll never hurt you" "I'll never leave" "You're the only one for me"

I laugh to myself for being so ignorant

I've been used, abused and abandoned by men who promised to be consistent

consistent they were but at all the wrongs things and I promised myself to never again be unseen

Would I regret not giving him a try or would my life be broken by another guy

As I stare at the wall under my blankets I can't help but think maybe this isn't love after all

I turn in my bed with all my thoughts let lose in my head, drifting away without any dread

I start to drift away peacefully knowing at the very end, love is an emotion that can't be tamed

But I have full control of the men I let play this love game

I unintentionally smile because I fell in love again and that's the real shame