Waiting For a Train To Come

Yesterday morning

with sunshine

slipping through the window

I unconsciously reached for your hand

and for a second

as if in a dream

I could feel your touch

the warmth of your fingers intertwined

with mine

But like a dream the feeling fades

the fog evaporating over

the river of my life

each morning

I lose you again

and again

forgetting little details about you

like the arc of your laugh

or the way your lips feel

pressed firmly up to mine

In these last days,

the sound of trains in the distance

are my only solace

like movie endings

where the image

of a platform shrouded in steam

beckons me onward

and the train has arrived

in the nick of time

to take me away

to the place I’m supposed to be

So I’ve decided I’ll board that train

take it wherever it goes

and I’ll pack one little picture of you

to show to little old ladies

who wonder why I’m alone

and so I don’t forget that day

when love seemed possible

when I woke up to the sound

of your dreams

and knew I loved you

It’s a shame sometimes

how this train rolls on forever

and beckons life ever onward

how there are only a few moments

to get it right

and a lifetime to regret it

though I knew I loved you

I still never said it

And though I repeat it like a mantra

you can’t hear me now

over the sound of the train

that is coming for me

Though for one brief moment

there was a perfect day

when you picked me up from the station

and drove me to your house

you kissed me in your tiny kitchen

and made me broccoli soup

and kissed me again

just for good measure

That night

I remember I lay awake

listening to your heartbeat

and the silent river of your dreams

in both of which I heard

a gentle shift in my soul

a change in the firmament

like after a long journey

when you finally return home

only to find your bags packed

and that the sands have shifted

beneath your feet

It is those nights

when the rattling noise

of life’s slow march forward

wakes me from my slumber

and I reach into my pocket

to find I have a ticket

destination unknown

and that there’s no more time

to linger in dreams

of hearts and hands and kisses

no more time

my love

my train has come