Trying to Let Go!

The aching in my heart sends vibrations through my soul. Emptiness like a cloak covers me. Silence fills the house where I thought we had built a home. Questions, so many questions running a maze through my mind. Here with me one day and gone the next. I'm lost trying to find my ground.

You have forgotten us, laid us to rest never thinking of me; but me fighting to make sense of why I can't let go. I think of you too often, wonder how could you have left and been so cold. Wishing numbness would invade me now and turn my heart cold. Where's my peace from the grief that is breaking me.

Consumed by the loss I feel the failure beating against me unable to silence the self hate, the anger, and the rage at your ability to walk away and leave us for another. You closed our chapters in the middle of our story and entered another book.

Sometimes I can make it through the day not feeling the loss. Opening the beginning of a novel that is filled with promises and new possibilities. Other days it's like a storm is gathering and a cloud of grayness follows overhead.