today i hid in the toilet and cried

today I want to be alone

but it's Tuesday 9am and I

am already on the fucking field

in the forest with my

fucking brushing machine which

broke down again because someone

took it without asking

cos my name wasn't

written on it.

.

today I don't want to be talked to

because I might punch

someone in the face

.

so I starve until 1.30pm and

then hide in the van for

lunch but then they all

show up, so I ask: why

no one worked from 12?

then where did everyone go?

.

today I don't want to be crowded

in the car trying

to spoon my food into

my mouth instead of

dropping it on my pants but

this ass next to me keeps

jumping on his seat, hitting

the thermos out of my hand

splash! there my lunch went.

.

today i just want to go home

and hide somewhere nobody

can find me, but the house

is crowded with 3 Indians

making music with pots and

pans and shouting like they

are selling paratha from a Delhi food stand

.

today I don't want to be

touched or talked to

but the 2 Latvian are yelling even louder

they got mad cos his fucking tank got shot

it's just a stupid game but no

he cares more about the

score than the lines he brushed

bang! there goes a fucking cup

and hits me almost in the head.

.

i just want to be alone, can't you

understand? stop stepping on my

yoga mat and ask me what I journal about

it's too much, my mind won't go quiet

.

so I hide the toilet and cry

until someone knocks on the door and takes

away my last private space.