To: Daddio

One Year-

It’s been rough.

Like your beard against my skin,

Loss embracingly pricks memories of you from my brain.

I can’t seem to find order in my Life,

Like how you could organize everything so neatly.

I find comfort in the chaos

Knowing you wouldn’t.

I still don’t see the Beauty you found and claimed in me,

Everyone agrees, and I wish I could hear you say it one last time.

Echos of your sarcastic and loving “babe” reverberates in my ear-

I’d buy a broken record player if I could transfer it.

I wish you could meet all my new friends,

But they’ve met you in every story I tell.

People don’t know our last name,

It’s too sacred for anyone to say, even me.

I don’t think I could ever leave Miami,

Because you’re here: in the water, sand and waves.

Sometimes I sit in the midday Sun,

To feel it kiss my face the way you did.

Abuela misses you,

And I’ve tried to take care of her the best I can.

But I know she can’t wait to join you and Arturo

On a cloud sailboat in the Big Blue.

I miss you too,

Not a day passes where I don’t remember something you’ve taught me.

Every other sentence starts with “my Dad…”

And sometimes you feel a little less gone when I do.

I carry you in my Heart, Soul & Spirit,

Daddio.

Everything I’ve done and has yet to come,

I know is through and for you.

To Daddio,

Thank you.

Goodbye,

See you soon.