Thirty-Eight

Is there where I pictured myself?

I turn 38 soon...

Very soon.

And I try to think of 8 year old.

I wonder what she thought life would be

When she was older, much older.

I remember she wanted to be a teacher

Then a businesswoman

Then a writer.

So fickle already at such a young age.

Some things don't change, I suppose haha

I'm still me.

The little girl in me

Overambitious, bossy, cute, even

Has not died

But she's grown tired

Weary.

Life has stretched her thinnnnn oh so thin

She sits now,

Wondering.

Is this where she wants to be?

At 38.

Probably not.

She had dreams, bigger dreams

Which are all just anxious nightmares in her sleep now

But she still smiles

Looks forward to her favourite noodles and cake

And hope nobody pisses her off.

She looks forward to not switching her laptop on for a day

And maybe finding some time to read...

You know...

The simple things.

Thirty eight.

More wisdom to collect,

More love to give,

More time to spend...

Being me.

Happy birthday, little one.

You've grown one year older.

Take care.