The Recently Divorced

The recently divorced should not jump into countless engagements in an attempt to cloud the view of others.

I do not understand America's obsession with marriage.

It means nothing if you do it for the wrong reasons.

It seems desperate to want to get married as soon as possible.

Like there is a ticking time bomb that will exploit if you are not married by a certain age.

Weddings are in bloom like seasonal flowers.

It's a billion dollar industry.

It's an event people overpay for.

I am pro do it yourself.

No one will remember all the details once it's said and done.

And if they fault your homemade cheesecake they have bigger problems.

I will be the one drinking mindlessly as glasses of free champagne keep refilling themselves.

I would rather be seen, and not heard.

This is the party of a lifetime.

A celebration that could soon turn into a nightmare when you pledge your life and love to only one person for eternity.

A person you think you can trust but makes you unhappy in coming years.

Instead of trying to work it out,

You will jump ship on them and find someone else.

Vows mean nothing.

They are just words once spoken in front of an audience.

When you promise forever, forever has an expiration date.

It's more an until date.

Until you get fat, ugly, poor, annoying.

Forever came to soon and now you are left with matching China that is to fancy to use.

The thrift stores are crowded with divorce China and old wedding dresses.

Because spending thousands on a dress you can only wear once is a part of life.

Similar to death and taxes.

Debt is something negative you can rely on.

Some people get married more than once.

If you didn't mean it the first time,

What makes anyone believe you mean these vows this time?

You will jump ship when things get hard with this relationship too.

Back to the drawing board.

Back to the, I need to find a husband as soon as possible game.

These are the reasons I choose not to get married.

My assets are my own.

I am not trapped in a legal situation.

I won't lie to the church and god about loving someone in sickness and for the poorer.

I can do these things without a ring on my finger.

I can be with someone without spending a fortune to throw a party for everyone else and their plus one.

*This poem will be featured in my upcoming book "Peeling Sanity."

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