The Porcelain Toilet

He was clean-cut, a noble fellow, but humble in nature.

He loved people & interactive experiences,

And was always ready to be of service.

He enjoyed propping people up,

And helping them lighten their loads.

His throne room was always ready for company.

And he was more than willing to share his top seat to make his guests feel comfortable.

But for some reason (perhaps because he ruled in a land previously laid waste by greed), nearly every time he had a visitor the exchange left him feeling rather dirty.