The Pits

The Pits

*

Welcome down here to the pits

where everything you eat gives you the shits

and there ain’t no shelter from the cold

and as soon as you’re born you’re growing old

and the sun that shines just burns your eyes

and the wind that blows keeps telling lies

and the grass is brown and cuts your feet

and bugs are the only meat.

*

It feels so good to feel so mean,

put chewing gum in a magazine

and thumb your nose at optimism

and cheer for every cataclysm.

It’s good to see unhappiness

from deep down here within the pits

where we will share my misery,

after all I got my own for free.

*

When you’re down here, you are alone.

There ain’t no signal on your telephone,

but if you want some company

you can always find an enemy.

If you take a walk you won’t get far

before you get hit by a car,

and if you see a pile of dog shit

somehow you will still step in it.

*

There’s room for you down here with me

drowning happiness in misery,

and painting every color gray,

and finding hate in every day,

and sneering every time we smile.

I’m glad you’re here, now stay a while,

I sure could use the company

and the pits is the place to be...