The Fictional Love

I have read so many romance novels to live parts of my life within them.

Each have brought so much joy,

but remind me that those versions of love are fictional and I need to settle for the reality of the bare minimum.

But how can I when I invade his dreams and he would rather remain asleep so that he may find me there,

or being so all-consuming in his mind that his heart starts to burn for me,

a torture he does not want to give up.

I want that kind of love. The one where I know it's real and my feelings can finally match someone else's.

I will not settle for the constant wanting for my body,

or the obsession to want to be liked too,

or the disappointment when I can't be their first choice.

I want to be wanted for me,

all of me.

But I guess that can only happen in a novel.