The Authentic Self

Resting on the couch with pipe dreams and

Reaching for the stars in my imagination,

The sun rises and reality sets in

Behold, I see the light;

Dust on the corner table where I write,

Unfinished coffee on the mantle,

The remainders of neglect and profit

Coexisting in the guise of stability,

Harmony intact, fluidity be damned…

I realize what others won’t do for me

It stings, it hurts and I admit that

All I have are

This brain

This body,

And the promise of mindful spirituality

That drags me from my self imposed silo,

Scraping by, struggling, vulnerable.

Yet still sitting,

Clutching at the vestiges of my past and visions of the future,

With my mind, my body, and my soul

I choose to accept its gifts and choose to feel its pain wholeheartedly,

Because it’s a part of me,

Unequivocally mine;

So I keep trodding along

This arbitrary path,

Wherever it leads,

Simply me.

I bivouac under its pretenses,

Unpretending, I remain.