Talking to God

I wish it were as easy as taking off my shoes

I wish I could wake up in a time that has long passed

I want to go back to the world I was born in

Everyone I knew of that time was still alive

Now I am living in the present

Less friends, fewer family members

Waking hours are spent trying to make it one day at a time

Dreams are bittersweet portals to a time I can’t access

I crave for You to remove this pain inside me like taking off my shoes

I long to remove it from my body

Take my heart and squeeze the pain away

Let the blood drip from the gentle, fragile muscle

It’s tired, it’s had enough

Below my weary soul, I see Your hands catching blood

You don’t allow it to escape the crevices of Your hands

So detailed, so meticulous, so wonderous You are

You have saved every single drop of bad blood

You have saved every part of me even the darkest blot

My blood is transformed in Your ethereal hands

It is clean gold, shimmering

It is full of life, it is worthy

You don’t replace what I thought was garbage

You use it to shift my view to see Your glory

I am filled with a glow, a glow I tried to diminish

You fill me with happiness and joy

Thank you for not ridding that part of me

Who would I be if You did?

Thank you for wiping my tears