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I chug water so something is in me
I have pleasure from the pain of a mostly empty stomach
At first the pain was just that... pain
It was me punishing myself
But now I enjoy that feeling
I control when I have it... my only form of control
I wait until I get dizzy and eat the smallest amount I can
Then I wait for it to happen again
I don't know if I can get out of this cycle
I starve myself for control... for pleasure.
About the Creator
Rene Peters
I write what I know, usually in the form of poetry. I tend to lean towards mental health, epilepsy, and loss/grieving.
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Comments (5)
This was so relatable because I love doing this to myself too
I struggled with anorexia and body image in my teens. No one noticed. We can fool do many. I over exercised. It's a fries chore. Control is my culprit.
Sending virtual hugs!!!❤️❤️💕
Food is sometimes the most dangerous drug/tool/weapon out there...
I hear you in that. It’s hard to realize it is actually a form of self harm. I struggle to get myself to eat often so I batch cook. I can feel the pain in this poem. Well done