something sweet
-some would say sickly
How do you describe too much?
To me, it’s taking a bite of pastry, and starting to choke.
Were you excited? when you looked through the shop window.
Did you see something you didn’t even know you wanted?
Surprisingly, there was no line.
Surprisingly, it was the last one.
surprisingly, surprisingly, surprisingly
You look at this treat in front of you and knew exactly what you were getting
but your face is turning blue
but your vision is fading
but your hands are at your throat.
With tears in your eyes, tell me: whose fault is it,
mine or yours?
About the Creator
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Masterful proofreading
Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
Tortured Soul
The soul careened blindly through a void where it scraped against the walls of a narrow tunnel, amassing a cumulative friction that created all the heat the devil would ever need to torment it. There was no light at the end, not even a fire. From the bottom a cold wind blew, and the clash of extremities spawned vapors of terror in the deadened and numbed appendage that was this strange, delirious, drunken consciousness.
By C. Rommial Butler5 days ago in Fiction
Comments (6)
Great job! Sounds really great, keep making more like this lol ❤️
Wow, these looks very yummy. What a shame I can't have one...🥲 Congrats on Top Story!🥳🥳🥳
Whoa! Nice job.
Outstanding! Keep striving for greatness—congratulations!
Trinity, your writing so eloquently conveys the overpowering sense of excess that it makes readers wonder who is to blame in a visceral and heartbreaking way.
With tears in your eyes, tell me: whose fault is it, mine or yours? This line makes the reader understand that you are trying to tell us something but much like the character and oxygen, we don't get to have it.