Screams Inside

I wake up every morning, routines awaiting

How did I let my life become this way?

My hands are shaky, wet with sweat

My brain is cloudy, and full of regret

This life I have, is just a mess

A circus act, a zoo, a crash of disorder

But I smile, my eyes bright and open

Hiding this feeling has become easy,

No longer makes me queasy

No longer stops the social interaction I'm expected of

I won't dissapoint anymore,

I'll make everyone happy, at my expense

I hope it's worth it

I hope it makes you happy

I hope it makes you smile

I hope you know that there's no denial

None from me, I don't deny my act

I stand here proudly, accept my fate

To please others instead of myself

So that I can exist on this earth without question

I am smiling