Scars

What if I told you that I’m not who you think I am

What if I said I am not who you want me to be

Would you still look at me the same way

Or would you turn away in disgust like the others?

I have been neglected by people in my life for years

All because they were afraid of my scars

The wounds I had hidden in the deepest parts of me

Even if I show a fragment of it to them

They run away in terror and leave me all alone

And I am left with the thought,

What’s wrong with me?

Years and years later

My heart had grown numb

For I was used to being rejected by others

Or ignored by those who I have tried to connect with

And when you appeared and talked to me

I was taken aback

Unsure of what to do

Or what to feel

You told me you’d never leave

You still cared for me even with my scars

You repeatedly told me those things

But I refused to believe it

Because I was afraid you were like the others

So I pushed you away despite my heart begging me to stay

I left you when my mind yelled at me to turn back

My entire being fought with me

For I was too stubborn to let you in

Until I gave up in the end

Allowing you in

I gave you the pieces of my broken heart

And you slowly put them back together

Despite my worries and anxieties

You washed them away with a smile

Like the waves on the sand

And with your presence

I have allowed myself to feel again

The emotions I had shut off long ago

Came back with just one word

One action from you

I cracked open a soft smile

While a tear rolled down my cheek

As I looked at you

Eyes full of love

And I can’t help but think,

“Where have you been in my life?”