Reality's Game #2

by Ilana Weiss 2 years ago in sad poetry

The Memories

Reality's Game #2

I'm addicted to the negative thoughts,

As they scream out their presence

Every night in the darkness.

Swallowing up all things positive,

Making everything vanish in front of me,

Becoming all-consuming,

So they're all I see.

But these thoughts,

I've done this to myself

Since I was a child.

Save me from myself

Before it's too late.

But wait.

I don't want it to stop

And I don't want your help.

I'm unpredictable.

Careless.

My thoughts make me unique.

I don't wanna be just like everyone else.

What happens when the pain stops?

When it's gone?

Are we even alive without pain?

Let me drown

Let me remember

The scars on my arms

The scars on my heart

It's all the same.

Stuck in a dystopia,

The whole world is falling under.

Not everyone can be saved

Not everyone wants to be

So when does that line get crossed?

Once the darkness comes

And you fade to black,

You never forget

And happiness is tarnished.

It will never be the same,

As you will forever remember,

And that's the worst part.

You tell yourself you will never forget

And you never do

Because it makes you who you are.

You get addicted to the memories,

The sadness in your heart,

The stresses your body carries,

And if you speak your mind,

The world turns you into an outcast,

And outcasts don't seem to have a place in this world,

But to feed off of each other,

And their negative emotions,

Creating yet another vicious cycle.

The world has nothing to offer you

And you have nothing to offer the world.

They just want to "fix" you

Using their own devices

Prescription pills

Therapy

Hospitals

All it does is numb you

To who you've become

And how you got there.

Just a way to put a label on you

Because you're different

And they don't understand,

So they fear you.

They fear the unknown,

And try to suppress and invalidate you,

But is that healthy?

Do you really learn to cope like that?

Or do you just become desensitized

To your reality?

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Read next: I Am A Bullet.
Ilana Weiss

I am an aspiring writer. I have a little boy is two years old and currently pregnant with my second child. I am 21 years old and I love learning new things. I have an even stronger love for nature.

See all posts by Ilana Weiss