Parting Waters
A Flashku
The cool of her silky liquid is healing to me, fusing with that deepest part which only she could touch.
I tell her how I’ve missed her, how thankful I am to return.
“I love you,” I whisper.
She responds by demonstrating her power, quickly rising in anger of my neglect.
As her wave furiously charges towards me, towering above my head I whisper to her I’m sorry.
“Don’t break. Not. Yet.”
Not yet
She mercifully obliges, parting ways. Her lines forming a deep V directly before me, crashing either side but allowing me through.
Up and over.
My privilege.
This was inspired by Cendrine’s post An Emotional Moment in Nature.
The challenge is to write a Flashku. I quote Cendrine below;
The Flashku is a form of "poetic fiction" that I created in 2021. This short piece of flash fiction (50–100 words) is inspired by and features an image. It contains minimal descriptions and uses seven words borrowed from another written piece (fiction, novel, poem, newspaper article...). The climax should be reached at about 80% through the story (not a strict rule, though), while the ending must contain a positive / inspirational twist or resolution.
As this was a very last minute find and entry, I wrote this before realising I needed an image and a reference. However, it was easy to find a photograph which matched the image in my mind. The memory of wading out to the ocean, with a surf board under my arm. I was describing this memory exactly. My conversations with the ocean would indeed go something like this. And when I describe the waters parting upon my request, they truly did.
These moments were some of my first introductions to the true magic of nature (and us). It was the start of a whole new level of understanding for me in regards to how we can communicate and influence each other in such ways. Surfing for me was about exploring this relationship with the ocean. When I learned how to listen, she would direct me exactly where I needed to be. I was always the least experienced in the water, and yet always perfectly placed as the waves rolled in. It reached a point I could paddle out to the big sets with my hair completely dry, knowing exactly when to wait and when to paddle. And she would always part ways for me and let me bounce up and over with ease.
The line I speak to her? Not Yet. These words always carried the memory of the Hans Zimmer track Now We Are Free from the movie Gladiator. The music played in my mind whilst wading out towards the waves. Of course the other words are an interpretive translation from the original to English.
[The original is actually written in a made up language by writer Lisa Gerard, who received significant recognition for the song. The album sountrack, composed by Zimmer and Gerard won an Academy Award. It is a truly stunning piece of music.]
*****
Small note! I overlooked Cendrine’s brief of the reference being a written piece of work. An oversight in my rush for this last minute (actually, past the deadline) entry! So this is NOT a Flashku! Check out Cendrine’s article linked above to explore what a Flashku truly is. Next time I will not be rushing 🙈❤️✨🙏
Although…
I wouldn’t have written this without the prompt and time presssure, and I’m so happy with how it turned out.
As Bob Ross would say, there are no mistakes, just a happy accidents! ❤️😇
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Comments (36)
You aced this one!
This was magical and alluring and I pictured my own moments in the ocean waves ❤️
You nailed it with the Bob Ross quote! Exactly! A brilliant and inspired accident in this case! Well done! I really felt as if I was with you in the water!
Excellence - Congratulations on your Top Story🎉😉📝💖
A very brilliant flashku! I feel this truly did the prompt justice and you have a great talent for these representations of using short pieces to masterfully tell a story with emotional resonance
*Soul-touch moments* Oh my ocean heart! Sea Sistar Kayleigh, you swam (surfed) your way to magnificence here. Both destination and journey...beauty in motion!
Gorgeous poem Kayleigh!
Not suprised to see this. Congrats on Top Story!
This was very good I will have to try flashku sometime
Back to say congrats on your awesome top story! 👍😊🌊
I love how you and the water understand each other. nice work
Huhhhh... so You trademarked the term "flashku?" Lowkey I thought it would be about a short action story written in haiku form. Something like this: Waves roll our vessel As water forms skyscrapers The calm has left us Recently though when it comes to haikus I've learned that they must have meaning to be read top to bottom and bottom to top. Though, I must type, Yout flashku is just as sensually erotic as much as it is about nature. It's common in literature to compare the ocean to that of a woman, especially her body. Both are considered to be a privilege. As a child I was raised not to fear water, but to respect it. Most people don't fear water. They fear what resides in it, they fear its darkness as light barely penetrates its depths, they fear the crushing pressure underneath its immense weight, they fear the lack of breathable air as water surrounds and fills its volume entirely, and they fear that one may expend their energy entirely against a soulless force of nature that neither cares who lives or dies within its hold. People worldwide fear the water, and even fewer have come to respect it, let alone learned how to properly respect it. For such a powerful force of nature, we should learn how to be benevolent to it and all its inhabitants, lest we doom ourselves. For though it is home to many, it does not care for them as we can, for the ocean only exists as it is.
The ocean terrifies and excites me in equal measure. I get nervous watching Moana, LOL. However, I absolutely believe we can communicate with nature and elemental spirits. Your note about surfing will stay with me for a long time. Congrats on your Top Story! 🥂🌊
What an incredible happy accident. So glad you messed it up 😉
I think this is beautiful
What a beautiful “happy accident” with many layers to it, and a wonderful authors note at the end with relatable sentiments! So glad you wrote this! 💫💞
Wonderful!!! Enjoyed the poem and the background information!!! Love this!!!
Theh small note takes the cake for me. LOL. But I do love you non-Flashku. the wording subtle yet forceful much like the ocean waves. Congratulations on Top Story!
Kayleigh, I am obsessed with your poetry style. Congratulations on top story. 🩵🎉
This was stunning. You are so inspirational and such a kind soul! I hope you'll let me interview you on the podcast one day! Congrats on top story!
Ah, the sea. What I liked about this was the harmony between you and the sea. It was reminiscent of a rider and horse, that symbiotic relationship where both benefit because they move together. Congrats on TS.
Very cool concept! I've never heard of a flashku before, thank you for sharing this with us. I know it was just a small part of it, but water truly is healing. My grandmother used to say, "I need some salt air", which of course meant that she was planning to go to the beach.
beautifully written, congratulations on top story!
Well, in your rush, you made something so enjoyable to read! So lovely! ...and such a great song!
A happy accident indeed! Great work!