Only hurts

You feel so emotionally drained and hurt inside for what reasons is true

You truly don't know anymore, beginning to feel like nothing to anyone anymore

Wonder if I'm better off without

I can't stop thinking of what I have lost, going over and over in my head how worthless this all is

Is my mind the big enemy here, or is there some truths here ?

I love those kids as my own, I adore them, id do anything for them but there not my own, they won't be my own

I promise to try not to let them down and ill be by there side

But now I'm hurting over the losses I have had, I'm hurting on thoughts I'm having

And those thoughts are so cruel it's messing with my head on what to do

Inside I feel myself breaking, I'm shaking and I'm worrying nothing will be the same once another baby comes along

It's just another baby to you, you have watched yours grow done alot, made a noise just between you and her, you gave him a nickname

This baby where would it fit in, will your kids still fit in?

I'm being silly, I know I'm being silly, tell me I'm being silly even with some truths behind it

Everything will be okay in time, as I could run away you know

Rather my thoughts run away, rather this situation wasn't my situation, I wish this wasn't my troubles to deal with

Take deep breaths but I feel pain, I feel so emotional, so tired and fed up

Do I know anymore, what do I do?

I see every day how much love you got for your kids, I got love for them to but it still hurts to know

I hear and see every day you and your ex, nothings there no more but it still hurts you know

I am friends with her and deep down I hear and know stories and past with you both, it really hurts

This is being so difficult and hard to explain, just imagine a really happy family just the parents separated, good comunication between them, good friends and then your there

So I wonder if I'm better off without

But I love you lots