of all I can ever be

Of all I could ever be

As look over the edge

All the success I have felt

Of all that I have healed from

All I could ever be

Is so unreal

Thinking of what would happen

Would they all line up

And cry

For I tried

But succeeded

Would all the girls be gossiping about me

Would all the boys be crying on their knees

I forever I hope that a day like that would never come

All dressed up for a party of the ground

The world would be covered in rain

The town would be in tatters

My parents would be so shocked

The whole town would be crowded

Oh please take this in mind

How do I say what to do

All I could be

Somehow doesn’t amount anything

As I lay in bed

I think of I have delayed

Would this illness claim me in life forever more

Or will I be a champion

Will be loved

Or would be the beloved daughter gone away

Will someone save me

Will my little brother walk in

Will someone please call out to me

Before all I can be is gone

Oh please I ask of you

What am I to do

The numbing feeling of a blade on my skin

Sounds so right

But I just want to fight it

I want to cry

All god Please help me so

This feeling I feel

I feel numb

I am just crying

I am just trying to survive for tomorrow

Tomorrow I cry out

Help me

so

I don’t fade

Help me

So

I don’t die

Oh god

I know it’s wrong

But god…

It just seems so right

This is not cry for attention

This is a cry in the night

That I make with all my Might

Of all that I could ever be