(Not) One of Us

she takes form of a beggar just to test,

the love in the hearts of all the rest,

.

the price of a coffee too much to give,

to help her survive, to help her live,

.

oh, it’s it’s such a bitter pill,

so few want to, or will

.

people she would have done anything for,

even those she took in when they came to her door,

.

people now sleeping safe and sound,

after she helped them to turn their lives around,

.

people she fed when they fell through the cracks,

no will at all to help her back

.

she couldn’t imagine not helping another,

in her situation, any sister or brother,

.

even a person considered an enemy,

would have received the price, of a cup of tea,

.

people she had given all her time for,

to be by their side, when they needed her more,

.

memories of offering to shave her hair

to raise money for another when they needed care,

.

nowhere, nowhere to be seen

their hearts warped by thoughts so very mean,

.

people she loved with all her heart,

no longer benefiting from her spark

.

quick to turn their backs for good,

leaving her alone to beg for food

.

and what of her county I hear you say?

well that’s a story for another day

.

Scotland has no voice allowed,

no way to help their citizen in shroud

.

for it still remains a chained prisoner

at the mercy of Westminster

.

who were told not to help or intervene

according to information that she’s seen

.

political hand shakes and meeting some president’s wife

is far more important than her life

.

what a sorry world to see,

greed valued before liberty

.

at least for today she’s not inhaling mould,

or sleeping with ants from a cheap room sold,

.

today she has water and clean sheets to sleep,

and even a pillow to comfort as she weeps

.

releasing pain, a salt river of tears,

allowing the ground to absorb her fears

.

she refuses to turn her heart angry or bitter,

instead she chooses to become emotionally fitter,

.

working to keep her energy aloft

protecting her sweetness, keeping her heart soft

.

a year passes by - with few real people

only this digital world, that’s become her steeple

.

and she thanks in prayer everyday,

every piece of kindness that’s come her way,

.

blessing every single soul,

who have helped her to pay this heavy toll

.

for defending the people who don’t even care,

to understand what she did for them there,

.

warped by judgements not their own,

programmed so easily by their phone

.

rising above bitter is the hardest task of all,

especially knowing there is nowhere left to fall,

.

no help at all for doing what was right,

calling out a force of might,

.

who used their power to hurt and harm,

so their friends can poison the working man’s farm

.

a web of greedy policy

that harms us all, don’t you see?

.

she works so hard to remain sane,

in a world so hateful, this world of blame

.

a world of poison that slowly kills

anything that speaks out against the ills

.

of honour-less dogs and mutts who run,

these countries just to have their own fun,

.

so hard to fight against my emotion,

so I learn to release it, for I have a better potion

.

one that heals and cures all ills

one that fuels creations at will,

.

I fill my heart with love for all,

no matter what, despite my fall,

.

because I understand that life

is powered by love and not by strife

.

and even when my hair fell in clumps

& my skin broke out in poisoned lumps

.

Even on the days of the worst stress

and I became a crying mess

.

Still I chose to return to my heart

we had journeyed this far, no way I would part

.

but paying yet another hefty fee

watching my health and youth decline before me

.

for trying to help those less fortunate than me

people who needed all the world to see

.

what was happening here as they tried to raise

their voices against threats of the grave

.

their bravery and courage inspired me so

that they continued to rise even after that blow

.

on 9th May (22) when THUGS were paid

to come on buses and start a raid

.

to beat unarmed man and woman and child

burning all to the ground, leaving the protest defiled

.

I still can’t believe what my eyes have seen

military and government working as a team

.

against their own people poor and needy

whilst they fill their pockets

heartless and greedy

.

and then there’s the man who stole from me,

more crafty and deceitful than I knew anyone could be

.

an easy target he knew wouldn’t complain

to corrupt police and relive that trauma again

.

how very hard to rise above

the wrath that fits me like a glove

.

how easy to wish him a life of pain

for seeing me only as a way to gain

.

material things that bring nothing real

as you crushed my spirit in order to steal

.

things that had meaning only to me,

my writings and journals, sentimental jewellery

.

instead of my heart growing in hate

I decide to put my trust into fate

.

and you gain my pity, for it will be true

that karma will return tenfold to you

.

oh how sorry you will be be,

for all of the pain done unto me

.

you think you’ll ever manage to sell

your soul out of this Sri Lankan life of hell?

.

I hope that you do, I hope that you

For then you’ll be forced to remove your disguise,

.

and face the shame of who you've been

the face that only I have seen

and it will be me on that day

who will forgive you and help you to pray

.

asking forgiveness for all your wrong

because that’s the depth of my love so strong

.

I deeply know the cure for this Earth

Is love from within, the most powerful force

.

I’m the solution, I make it so

It doesn’t matter how others choose to go,

.

It only matters what I carry inside

And I choose for love to be my bride

.

I choose love no matter what

Because I refuse to sit and rot,

.

and rot I would, if I were to allow

negative emotion to sit behind my brow

.

I rinse it off, I shake it out

I make space for love, no room to pout

.

I exhale slow and inhale deep

allowing peace to begin to seep

.

back into my blood, where it should be

the foundation of love and joy energy

.

so next time you think you have it so tough,

know there are others who have it just as rough

.

and if I choose to smile, then so can you

because practice makes love

so easy to do

🤍

This song was in my mind as I was posting this. It seems fitting to link it here.

Above is a video of me reading this poem. I mess up the reading in the middle, but it was too emotional and I couldn’t face re-recording. I hope my vulnerability inspires ✨