My Love of Live Concerts.

Looking around me,

Nervously, nervously,

Anticipating the anxiety,

Of being in the crowd.

The hall is full of screams,

I feel fear;

I resist the urge to

run and disappear.

I'm shaking,

I'm sweating,

I'm crying;

But, still, I stay.

The stage finally lights up,

And the adrenaline fuels me;

Fuels me to stay and support

my favourite band or singer.

Music fills my ears,

And I am dancing through

the nerves and tears.

I cheer, and I sing,

Although a bag of mixed emotions,

I am in.

The end of the show arrives,

Nervously, nervously;

I look all around me,

I am glad I came;

Though I leave in a

state of anxiety.

Authors Note:

I have lived with PTSD since my teens. I was a victim of community and domestic violence from my teens to my young adulthood.

I love music, and I follow my favourite bands and singers on social media

Over the last few years, I have been trying to work through my trauma, which is also related to a fear of crowds, which destroyed my ability to see a concert.

I always go to see these bands with another person because I wouldn't be able to attend and feel safe if I didn't.

I have seen a few favourite bands and singers since I started attending concerts, though it is always difficult, I usually end the night in tears, shaking and sweating. I often feel embarrassed and ashamed because of this at the end of the night, but I am always happy to have been able to see and support my favourite bands and singers.

This poem has been written so that you can get a feel of what it feels like for me to face that crowd. I want to spread awareness of my condition so that if you are in a band or someone attending a concert and you bump into me, you will be able to understand my reaction.

I thank you for reading this poem, and one day, I hope to face my fear and see Liam Gallagher and Noel Gallager on that stage.