It seems...

It seems,

that the monsters inside my head,

Are worse than the monsters under my bed,

because at least when I was a child,

I had my imagination,

now all I have is limitation.

I go to a job

Where I fulfill others dreams

Trying to fill my time

By staring at a screen

Because the boredom kills

But the knowledge of

Being alive in a world that sees you

As a pawn

And surrendering your own

Dreams

And

Imagination

Is a suffering

I’d never want another soul

To experience.

The dollar bill weighs

In my mind

Worse than the suicide

Three dead this year

From needles in their arms

And a numbness that wished them gone

One hung themselves

In hopes of dangling for salvation

To drain the pain

Release the temptation

Away from their memory

But instead

they live on in my head

Voices of what they left behind

Echoing in the space

The void

That fills my time

I wish often that I was blind

That I could smile and pretend

That I didn’t hear the angels in my head

Asking to help those who aren’t yet dead

To spread the word of love

Especially to those who see me as a friend

But for years

I played a part

Put on a mask

To become the jester

And let my emotions inside me

Fester

And now the serious version of me

Is terrifying for some to see

I come with shadow and light

I come forth day and night

I have kissed rage and envy

And made it my delight

But I have tasted salvation

When death gave me this sight.

Alas, I am here to stay

To see another day

But time and energy

I can waste no more

Tho time may be an illusion

We have come crawling out the opened door

And with each breath we take

Is a another life at stake

So, please be kind,

Stop leaving those behind

Who are too lost to find

The rhythm in the rhymes.

Be a guiding hand,

Or a voice of solitude,

That offers solutions and

Gratitude.

Yes,

The dollar bill pays the rent

But it shouldn’t own my soul in exchange,

And I refuse to believe

“That’s life”