It's Just Like Going to Sleep

you whistled through your teeth, cracked edges

all askew and for me to stare at without warning,

and every single breath you took was a wheeze.

your eyes were dim and clouded over, a bad fortune

of what might be a terrible night in a string of nights.

even the touch of my hand on your side made you

seemed restless and jittery, ready to jump in anxiety,

and no amount of cooing lullabies brought you peace.

your eyes were the only things that told me what lurked

underneath the strain and the heaving breaths that rattled

out of your paralyzed form covered in the aftermath of sickness.

when I kissed your forehead, you finally closed your eyes for a second,

and I wished among all other things that you would go in peace.

even your tail did not flop back and forth like it once might have.

you were already so ready to slip away fast, as soon as you could,

and finally the vet brought in the syringe that would soothe you until

you drifted off into a sleep from which you would never wake.

I sang you one last song, this one filled with words of comfort,

and then at last you allowed yourself to fall, fall, fall away

even as I cried because you were gone far, far too soon.

~for Abby (2009-2014)