If I Could Change My Age

Dear Universe,

Innocent tears pierce my losing smile. Only if I could change my age to suit society’s fears or shame, I would sprint twice as fast than to change my name. I’m muddled in this sudden blow of frustration drowning in this why? Why did life decide to punish my birth with a date a few years late? I thought love was ageless, I thought the soul was the face, I thought logical and emotional transparency was the focus? Not a number society strapped on me with temporary labels. If I am to kiss the dirt in return of my death, why would society stare at me when I’m happy most? If those who love me embodied that feeling in its entirety, acceptance would fly again. Only if I could change my number to meet her wishes, only if I could race the years ahead to fulfil her worries, maybe I could meet her standards and honour her as the heaven upon my throne. I would challenge God to swear on my breath that for this numbering brand I wear, I’ve matured in my skin. But it matters not while we sleep in this invisible cage called age. It is a pain I can’t dispel despite I’ve prayed. My love suffers. And then I’ve learned, in my traditional village age is not a number it is content of character and how one chooses to lead the past into the future. This concept of age and identity play evaporates at the shores of my island. And as my elder told me “My boy, knowledge blo you wagbout pass, you wagbout behind.” That my knowledge walks first, and I walk behind. That wisdom does not shed upon the branded age, but the intensity of day to day circumstances. That knowledge is built upon resilience, humility, and determination, carrying the amplification of my merits which judges my age beyond the number my heart had been given. Oh universe, if I could change my age for her, I would sell my soul to the ends of time and free the genie from the bottle. As my mentor says “If it works, it works. No explanation required.”

~ H a y t h a m

T r u e h e a r t