I Should

This should be over already,

I should have moved on,

Forgotten you like a distant childhood memory.

But I keep thinking about you,

Wondering if time had worked a little differently ,

Would I enjoy your company?

Instead of laying alone,

Remembering.

I should remember just how you let me down,

It wasn’t gentle,

And look in the mirror at the scars that healed invisibly,

Without you,

I could do it again .

I should just remember what I wanted from you,

It was selfish,

And remember that I thought I could fix you,

Even when I was drowning in blue,

Because an idea interested me,

More than a person .

I could reach out,

But I should just move on.