I'm not loving it

I perceive life

However, I'm not loving it.

I feel like I am nothing.

I feel lost somewhere.

But I'm still alive.

I feel marginalized.

I feel like an alien.

Why me?

Why do I have to feel like this?

What am I going through?

I feel like sobbing.

I am terribly sad.

I don't feel like myself.

I'm not even sure why I'm depressed.

I have no plans for tomorrow.

I'm not sure what I'm living for.

I have no wife and no family.

I perceive life.

In an unusual way.

I wish it was easier.

to end my life.

I was planning to do it.

But the fear stopped me.

I'm not sure why.

I'm like an alien.

I wish I could just die.