I can't remember a time...

I can't remember a time when life wasn't like this.

I didn't choose this. It just happened and never changed.

I mean seriously, what's next?

I've been doing the same thing for so bloody long, just tumbling through the days.

Like breathing or blinking. Without any thought.

At least with eating you have options and can make choices. Well sometimes anyway, on a really good day.

But breathing and blinking. The same thing without any thought.

And thats how my life has ended up. Just one mindless mess day after day.

And even if I had a go thinking on it, I can't seem to think beyond my limitations.

Can you believe it? My imagination has totally up and died.

I honestly can't imagine having a life that is more than surviving.

If surviving day to day is all there is, and there will never be more, it's kind of a waste isn't it?

I guess I either need to let go or I need to bring my imagination back to life.

Because if I can't ever envision myself being more, having more or doing more, its never going to happen. You know?

******

I wrote this in response to a prompt in a writing group about the thoughts of a character that felt hopeless