How do I unlearn the worship of a man?

How do I keep my hands from shaking –

like an overeager pet –

when they at last notice their master's marked gaze

after walking softly through

the door?

How can I beat you out of my heart

when my heart has already pounded you

against my rib cage

like a tattoo

so that nothing can remove

your stain?

Or put another way:

how can I drain you from my veins

when the holes keep clotting

and my heart keeps pumping,

determined to drag you through

every

infinite

particle

that makes up my soul

and you’re burned onto my shaking frame

like an afterglow?

I’d rip you out of my chest

but I’m so tired

and you simply keep growing back,

growing back again,

and back again,

like a weed.

But isn’t a weed just an unwanted plant?

I’d be a liar if I said

that I wanted you gone at all.