Good for you

Laying here in bed is my new normal…. Nothing but pain in my heart is what I feel…. Why can’t he feel the same? Why am I the only one suffering? Get me out of this life.

I miss the country roads in Delaware we used to drive down, getting groceries, going to the water. Where has all these feelings gone? What the fuck have I done?

The soft warm cuddles, to his fingertips touching my body. I wonder am I nobody? I’m sad but more angry and hurt that I’m dealing with this by myself. I want to just bury a hole and sit there till my lungs die out.

Heart brake should be felt by two people not just one. It hurts…… my heart is aching with pain. All the happy memories I just can’t deal with it makes me mad. I get up and go to work but when I drive back I’m stuck being sad playing Olivia Rodrigo again…..

Good for you you look happy and heathy not me if you ever care to ask….

That’s what I feel……. No asking how I am or what’s going on. Your to busy to ask,to busy to care. I don’t understand why can’t that you see I’m hurting?

All I’m asking is for you to notice that I’m hurting… notice that I’m angry,sad,and just wanting you. But I guess your to busy with other stuff that you do.

I feel as if I can’t breathe, my love of my life has just walked out of my life and doesn’t realise what pain it’s causing. I want to say come back but I think I’m dying out. Instead of saying I still love you. I don’t even know if that’s right of me to do… I’m so hurt right now I simply don’t know what the fuck to do…. Please let me out of this life I’m stuck in….. please god that’s all I’m asking 🙏