Gold

I was indoctrinated into hatred before I could spell my name.

It soon became self-loathing I wore like clothing, it never left my soul.

So I grew silent, devastatingly quiet, just to fit in the mold.

I didn’t know I was gold.

I always accepted less than the best ‘cause I thought that’s what I deserved.

The pain was the worst, I had no self-worth, and that left me vulnerable.

Because I am different I thought I deserved it, so I never told.

I didn’t know I was gold.

I would incessantly pray every single day but nothing ever changed.

When starving couldn’t fix me I’d cry desperately, ‘God take me away’.

I couldn’t bare it, I cannot to explain it, I bought the lie I was sold.

I didn’t know I was gold.

I was indoctrinated into hatred before I could spell my name.

Only recently did I embrace identity and feel valuable.

I never would have surmised I would apostatize, but lo and behold.

I finally know I’m gold.