God Rest the Queen

I have been concerned for days.

Worried you were weak,

Your indomitable strength

Slowly ebbing away.

Ninety-six. An old lady,

Your Majesty.

I saw you, stooped, cane-supported

Still regal, platinum.

I can't believe you're gone.

You have been there always:

A part of my life.

A monetary figurehead,

Even in strange lands.

In profile and

Watchful, gazing out of paper,

Metal and plastic, rainbow-coloured

Like your many tailored suits

And flamboyant plumed hats.

A connection to home;

An embodiment of my land.

Your constant presence

Reassuring.

It is a strange phenomenon:

Mourning someone I have never met.

And yet I know you. I know you well.

You have always been there

And I feel the loss keenly;

It has hit me, hard, this passing.

Knowing its presence was veering

Nearer, has not helped.

I was prepared, I thought

But I was not.

Sitting in a school hall

With strangers around me,

United in a collective gasp

When your death was announced.

Surprise and sadness palpable.

I got up, the rain outside fitting.

It should rain. It is bleak.

A grey evening, colourless: bland.

My car waiting and the radio

Full of talk of you; respectful,

Nostalgic, reverential.

Public figures, leaders, discussion,

Speech after speech.

I cry.

I hear the bells tolling,

A death knoll.

Their pealing unappealing.

My grief is true.

I will miss you.

Shaken I am, untethered.

I feel insecure:

If you are not here, what next?

I don't want you to be gone!

Acceptance will take time-

But your duty is done:

God Rest the Queen.

Queen Elizabeth the Second died today. I love the Queen and all that she stands for: duty, patience, decorum, constancy. She has been an enormous presence in my life and those of my peers, as well as my parents, and is a role model for leaders the world over as someone who has put serving her people above all else. However you feel about Royalty, the Queen has led and a huge void, for me, will be left by her passing. Rest in Peace, Ma'am.