Fire

I breathe deep as each foot hits the earth

Usually I would complain of my feet starting to hurt as I run, but

Breathing clear has never felt this good.

Each breath rejuvenates me through and through.

Skies are blue and my heart is full

In the first time in too many moons.

Some say that the city sank that day

As all souls, tied to the devastation here, there and everywhere,

Breathe a sigh of relief

For our sisters, brothers, totems and veins

Wrapped up and entangled in other worlds

Everywhere else at once, our hearts exploded

As we grieve for such loss,

Nothing will ever be the same.

Yet we all breathed the relief, drenched in pain

For just those two days.

We come together once again,

For just those moments

Only to find that the skies hurl anger

To remind us:

No, oh no

This is only the beginning.

You have not been listening.

When will you realise that a fish rots from its head?

The skies turn grey and the ancestors hands wrap closely, more closely

Around my trembling neck.

I can't breathe, I say, when will this end?

I'm trying to make change

Step by step, but

It's not enough.

I still can't pretend

That I don't grieve for lost country,

Empty wombs

The vision of small feet filling empty rooms

My throat closes tighter, my eyes well up

How can we go on?

What is the point?

The disease of more humans is not what we need.

We are the problem - we have to stop.

Blue blood trickles out my fingertips

Going, going, gone.

With each drop scales flake off

We're rotting, it's from the top

My arms outstretched

Trees bending, curving and merging

Some say they would be dancing, except

Their souls are gone.

Sap drips through my ribs

And with each drop

I feel relief - life persists

But only just.

And just like that,

My heart ignites

Flames bursting

This is our lesson.

Pulsating through my body,

I feel the grief of a hundred million years

Screaming, are you listening?

Scales shed into the river

And as we reunite

We can't go on, but we must

Bones broken, fractured, protruding

Fire can't burn this.

- EF 23/1/20