Digging the Past

I tried to move on from you

For how many times I walked away

I keep on trying to avoid you

Several times had pushed you away.

But here I am again chasing you

Your energy keeps attracting me

Confused on which direction to take

Why am I heading towards you again?

Learning the lessons these past years

Maybe I have not learnt until now

For I keep on chasing and running

Without specific path to take.

I still feel lost and contemplating

To follow which my heart really wants

Looking for signs everywhere

While ending to nowhere.

I was told that you are not my twinflame

That you are a soulmate I share a karmic situation

That you came to my life to teach me lesson

And not to be with me in this lifetime until the end.

But why I am still gravitated towards you

And cannot get you out of my mind

Even showing up in my dreams when I sleep

What am I supposed to do with you?

Do I still love you and do you still love me?

Am I really missing you and do you miss me?

Questions I want to ask you and myself

But always I stop even before I begin.

Dear universe give me your blessings

I want to know the answers to my feelings

Help me to take the leap of faith

And to trust the fate you have for me.

I want to move on and stop digging the past

To be free from memories that did not last

And keep going forward leaving my sadness

Looking ahead pursuing for my own happiness.