Dear Auto(nomic),

Dear Auto(nomic) Nervous System,

and I guess that includes you, Brain–

Just a quick note of thanks

for the ways you sustain.

I have to admit,

I haven't thought of you often–

but I should, you’re one reason

I’m not yet in a coffin.

If I were responsible to

beat my heart on my own,

my kids would interrupt

and my whole life would be blown.

While exercising, if I had to

pump my heart faster...

well, you know me,

I'm a bad multitasker.

I couldn't operate circulation,

where blood goes out and returns–

I'm directionally challenged,

I'd be forever adjourned.

I'm not clear on the difference 'tween

pulmonary, tricuspid, atrium, aorta.

I mean, I kinda know what they are,

but only just sorta.

Thank you for overseeing

that aspect of living,

your magnificent existence

is literally life-giving.

Also, thank you so much

for taking care of digesting–

triggering enzymes to manage nutrients

my body is requesting.

If I had to manually break down

all of my food,

converting it to its simplest form–

I’d be totally screwed.

How would I deduce what is vital

in the masticated brew,

or separate waste products

to be converted to poo?

I'm glad you handle the dirty work

so I can eat and just chill,

without having to manage the

arduous digestive drill.

Additionally, thanks for taking care

of my respiration.

With all of the other pressing tasks,

I'd totally forget inhalation.

As you know, Chemistry

was my least favorite subject–

Converting O2 to CO2

I'm certain I would not get correct!

How could I keep the lungs

and functions straight in my mind,

remembering differences between

bronchi, bronchioles and alveoli?

Any mixups would be tragic

so let me be curt–

your control means (for now)

I get to stay above dirt.

Yes, my dear Parasympathetic,

and the previous word minus para–

in layman's terms “rest and digest” and

“fight or flight” (named during the Common Era)–

The list of jobs that you manage

has to be miles long.

I'd like to thank you for a few more,

hopefully I don't get this wrong.

Cortisol output, heart rate,

contracting stomach/intestines.

Well, scratch those last two,

I already mentioned digestion.

Liver glucose, adrenaline,

blood flow, eye blinking,

releasing of bile,

pupils expanding and shrinking.

Body temperature, metabolism

sweating, tears, urination,

salivation, sexual arousal,

electrolyte balance {deep breath} and defecation.

There are so many more functions

that your ganglia conduct–

if I were responsible for them all

I’d be totally…

Well, let’s just leave it at this–

I’m so thankful to you

for all of the complicated

things that you do.

So, thanks for taking care

of those parts of my living,

your magnificent existence

is literally life-giving.

Alas, if I were managing those

operations during the thanks I just wrote,

I would have surely kicked the bucket

and you wouldn't have this sweet note.

So, I’m glad you’re in charge,

and I think you agree–

because without you I wouldn't be here,

and for you to exist you need... me.

Sincerely yours (very gratefully),

Me, which is also you, so...We